VIDEO: Wonder Woman (1974)

Special Bonus Video! The Agony Booth crew presents a deleted scene from the movie:

Dr. O’Boogie intrudes on Sofie’s territory with his own review of the Wonder Woman pilot! No, not the one with Lynda Carter, or the one with Adrianne Palicki—it’s the very first attempt to bring the Amazon Princess to life, starring future That’s Incredible host Cathy Lee Crosby as a blonde Wonder Woman with a lame costume and no powers, unless you count her amazing ability to always be on the phone.

Stick around until the end of this review! You don’t want to miss Sofie, the Film Renegado, Count Jackula, Sursum Ursa and Porn Critic reenacting a deleted scene from this movie that never actually existed—but should have. (Or, you know, you can just watch the YouTube video. It’s the same thing.)

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  • Cristiona

    I’d never even heard of this thing, but… holy hell.  That’s a lot of creepy perving.

    I think I can see the appeal of having her have no powers (especially since the original comic was largely just a bondage fetish book), but the execution here is just awful.

    • Thomas Stockel

       I actually remember seeing this when I was a kid and I kept wondering why they had gotten Wonder Woman so wrong.  I was not a Wonder Woman fan (Until Linda Carter.  That clip of her running?  Yeah, we lived for that every week.) and even I could tell they had gotten Everything wrong.

      Funny video, Boogie!  And kudos to everyone involved in the missing footage.

  • Jay_Bay

    Good Lord, this show is cheap…..even for 70s standard.  And so much wrong with the backstory.  Then again, this was the 70s.  As is with the constant perv-ing.

    On the “deleted scene”, yep you’re right Doc.  That’s why I click on it.  Then that ending made me feel bad for all those coy comments aim at Sophie.  Sophie, if you read this, I’m sorry.

    …..oh yeah, wanna hook up Sophie lol

    • Sofie Liv

      I agreed to it, all for the sake of comedy!

      and no, no I don’t want to.

  • I so want Renegado to return in the role of Abner Smith later, I don’t know why.. but I just love you in that role Jerry… erh this is Sofie writing don’t know what happened and why this didn’t sign me on my twitter account…

    • Sofie Liv

      Ah now I know, that’s my dads twitter account! … heh.. sorry dad.

  • Her being on the phone so damn much reminds me of how much people are on their phones nowadays. Except most of us don’t actually call people with them, like what the phone was made for, we’re too busy with wi-fi and all the money-wasting apps we have. It’s the world we live in I guess.

    Also, Sofie appears to be getting a lot of mileage out of that cosplay she has. I guess with the Agony Anarchists thing still in the works, it won’t be the last time we see it. Not that I’m complaining. 😉

    • Jay_Bay

      I agree, no joke, it’s been 8 days (and counting) since I actually made a call on my phone.  But it gets heavily used surfing the web and typing txts and playing FF5 and dicking around with Angry Birds.  If you just count me making calls (not the calls I receive), it goes way longer.  Our world is a weird world indeed.

    • Jay_Bay

      This is world we live in indeed.  I’m not sure when I actually made an actual call on my cell phone. A couple weeks at least (then again I do have a house phone, so it’s not a big deal), but I do much of my daily business……using my cell in txts and other ways.  I’m so ready for our robotic overlords.

      • I think Gin Rummy from The Boondocks said it best about texting: “Why would you spend 15 minutes trying to type some shit they could have called and said in 5 seconds?…plus it involves typing with your thumbs, which I just don’t approve of!”

        Yeah I text as well (“I sent that bitch a smiley face. Bitches love smiley faces!”) but I don’t neglect the phone’s primary function of actually calling people when I need to give out a lot of information that 150 characters just won’t contain.

        • Thomas Stockel

           I never text, but I figured that was just because I’m getting old and I’m losing my manual dexterity. 🙂

        • Jay_Bay

          Wait, I got a funny…

          “I gave Steve an ass.  Steve love asses.”

  • The_Stig

    Steve’s like “It’s a donkey! It’s a major award!”

  • BUT WONDER WOMAN. WE MUST GO OUT IN A DATE! I kidnapped agents and hold ransom for them for that very purpose!

    Loved how the sketch turned out, boss, keep up the great work xD

    • Sofie Liv

      That could actually turn out as a very odd comedy spoof movie actually spoofing women as the strong lead and all men worshipping her… because..

      We should totally make that!

      I got the plot right here, a beautiful overly strong woman, kind of like that major lady from Wreck It Ralph starts off the opening sequence, do all that flirtation stuff and yells as she kicks doors in, but by the end of the opening gets captured, cut to an ordinary plane looking woman whom some-how gets mixed up with her, is now required to do all that insane shit that “Strong female leads.” are supposed to do, and every-one around her acts like she is doing it to perfection.

      “Oh you are so strong and beautiful me lady, marry me.”

      *hangs upside down after a failed rope excersie.* “Wtf are you talking about? and why does every-one wants to marry all of a sudden? It used to be hard just making some-one buy me coffee!”

      • Ha, I can see that being a lot of fun, but we have to change the formula every once in a while, we’ll figure it out xD

        • Sofie Liv

          You know, I am honestly just writing that entire movie inside of my head right now.. there’s totally a Barbwire parody in there.

          “Don’t call me babe!”
          “What?”
          “I don’t like people calling me babe.”
          “.. you are running around, dressed like that on own violation, clearly some-thing done to gain attention, it must have taken hours to make your hair sit that perfectly, and you lipstick! not the tiniest bit out of place and you don’t want to be called babe?”
          “It’s objectifying me!”
          “You’re dressed as a star from leather and boobies the porn movie!”

          It should just be this one plain actually genuinely ordinary woman, stuffed into a team of the arche-typical “Strong female leads.” and encounter one cliche after the other in this place.

          But oh yeah, the smug Abner Smith is so totally the main villain 😉

          • Jay_Bay

            Ok, I think I have the story perfected.  

            The show starts with the typical “strong female lead” doing all the stereotypical stuff, saving the day and what not.  After a while, all the main villains get a call from an anomynous source where upon going to the secret location, they meet a Dr. Strange ripoff that he found out the heroine’s true identity (some simple name like Jane Smith or something funny like Sharon Cox)…..but it’s the wrong one.

            Cue average plain Jane going home from the store or from work.  All of a sudden, a van rolls up and a bunch of thugs hop out and gives chase.  She escapes from them, not from skill but from borderline absurd lucky breaks (some Rue Goldberg situations).  Then she gets home and sitting on her couch is a Mr. Somedude.  He sweeps her away to the main base, calling her by the SFL’s codename. Everyone at the agency treats plain Jane like she’s the SFL, gushing and gawking and fawning over her when she obviously knows nothing of what she doing.  Then the episodes write themselves. The plain Jane gets into situation and situation somehow making it work threw villains’ stupidity or just amazing luck.

            Major story ending or story twist-The handler (Mr. Somedude) actually knows Plain Jane is the SFL and all her “luck” is caused by him….and the SFL.  They just use plain Jane so SFL can go on vacation.

            ….but who can played the lead (my version has the Jane and the SFL the same person).

          • Sofie Liv

            Not a show, just a movie. And plain Jane is actually not a dumb person, she’s fairly intelligent, merely is she ordinary.. and I wanna play her! I came up with this concept it’s mine!

            And btw, amazing Jane was running from guards, bumbed into plain jane on he street, used the monumentary distraction to plant the thing she stole earlier on plain jane, then ran along to become captured and plain jane unknowingly goes along with the thing planted on her person, the agency comes and sees she has the thing, so there-for assumes she is the amazing jane and.. lets try not to make this sound to much like Cars 2 ….

          • Jay_Bay

            But Cars 2 was go…..hahahahahaha.  No way I can say that with a straight face.

            Also, thats my version. And plain Jane isn’t dumb in my version, just unusually lucky. Once again, a front created by….why am I defend a premise to a fake show that I thought of in like 30 mins.

          • Sofie Liv

            Beside the idea is mine! There! I just copy-righted it, claim Sofie Liv!

            This movie can both make a bold ‘clever’ statement about women in society AND have a lot of boobies within context, it’s a sure winner! 

          • Kenneth Peter Shinn

            Interesting. The whole “ordinary woman gets thrown into extraordinary adventures” thing isn’t new – the original idea for The Man From UNCLE was to have some average Josephine (or Joe) roped in by UNCLE each week to act as a new, presumably one-off operative, usually all unknowing as to what was going on. The idea was dropped as too restrictive, but on a one-off basis…hell, it’s still a fun idea, too right!

          • Sofie Liv

             My specific idea is also that it should be a comment on. “Strong female leads.” that this woman should just encounter one sexy over the top female lead arch type after the other, be required to be like them, and points out how ridicoulus that notion is. That was the foundation of my idea, that it should be a comment about how. “The strong female lead.” is usuallly being portrayed.

          • MephLord

            For “Strong Female Lead”, is the X-Men the most culpable comic ever?  Rogue, Storm, Jean Grey, Psylocke, Shadowcat.  Even lesser known X-Women like Meggan, Moira McTaggert, Magik, Boom Boom, Wolfsbane, Domino, and Jubilee have pretty distinctive personalities. 

            Even if the men in the X-Men do deliver the most drama, most of the story potential is based on the women in the X-Men Universe, and that still remains a pretty remarkable achievement.  And outside of She-Ra, does any other series have more female rogues?  Wonder Woman might be a close contender, but Mystique, Scarlett Witch, Phoenix, Deathbird and Callisto present a pretty good assortment of female antagonists.

      • Also, can we have Abner Smith on that show? :3 He’s just so fun to play for me.

      • MephLord

        Somehow that sounds like a Sif movie… “You can marry me if you can defeat me in combat” … “Why am I still a spinster?”

        • Sofie Liv

          Oh that character all-ready exists in a movie, try the Danish animation movie “Ronald the Barbarian.” … even for my danish standards it’s incredible silly. 

          • MephLord

            There are a few problems with that idea.  (1) I am not in Europe or the US, I’m in Canada and likely not even the Canadian site of Amazon would have that title and (2) I might not get any of the in-jokes that you would pick up on right away.

            There is only one show I find funny and it’s Keeping Up Appearances.  I do find parts of Seinfeld and Golden Girls funny but it’s not as good as Hyacinth and her schemes to look like she’s a part of high society.  I do not laugh at Frasier, Cheers, Are You Being Served?, Monty Python or other comedy staples.  So I’m not even sure if I’d find that movie to make me laugh in the least.

            I will however keep an open mind if I find a copy I’ll be sure to watch it and see if it’s an entertaining viewing.  In the meantime I’ll keep working on my scripts for movies that will never happen (Moon Knight, Tigra, Werewolf by Night, Vixen, Cloak and Dagger, and Blue Beetle) and sob at the crap we have to put up with (Catwoman, Jonah Hex, Man-Thing, Tom Jane’s Punisher, Green Lantern, Elektra, Spirit, Shadow, Phantom, Darkman, and ugh…Spawn).

          • Sofie Liv

            No you would get the jokes, none of them are subtle, question just are if you would find them funny or not. It’s boys humour dialed up to eleven.

            It takes the biggest shit out of Fantasy epics you know like, Lord of the Rings and of cause Conan The Barbarian.
            Just one visual gag, our hero comes across a place where there obviously has been a battle, and all the dead people just lays around in highly ridicoulus positions, one of them for instance, just has a huge sword shoveled up in his ass. And that’s just a back-ground joke.
            There’s a whole sequence where our main character uses this magic poison to make himself invisible so he can sneek into a castle, as it turns out though, there’s not magic poison enough for his entire body, so only his crudge sack/protecter is invisible, and we litterately have a whole sequence where we see a pair of floating balls going through the evil palace, almost getting ripped to pieces on the way. And the movie is like that all the way through, on the walls balls and boobie humour, and kids could of cause go in a watch that freely.
            Again, the US.. hah, sissy country. 

            Here’s a teaser trailer in English, it’ll give you a pretty good impression of the humour.
            It’s not my kind of humour, but it’s still very popular in this country, especially among teen boys (wonder why <_<)

            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lrR74Rrqdko

          • Jay_Bay

            …..I must watch this.

          • Sofie Liv

             The Danes are a silly people! Did I ever mention that?

          • Jay_Bay

            I kinda figured…but silly is fun

  • Good review, and fun little video at the end.  It’s just too bad Sofie’s such a spoil sport 😉

  • danbreunig

    I remember flipping through the cable channels after coming home late one night a few years back, and just catching this movie right away.  NO idea what to make of it, except maybe it was an MST3K reject.  What I mean is a movie that would’ve been right up their alley–old enough, cheap enough, cheesy enough, flimsy enough, dated enough, and plenty of events to riff on and pauses to put those riffs in.  And likely they probably didn’t do it because of something technical, like not securing the rights to it–just like you suggested, Albert, in your own written recap (remember those?) about “Night of the Lepus.” 

    And seeing this movie in this review for the first time since then–I’m now thinking this would be the U.S. equivalent of the movies featured in the Agony Anarchist reviews–severely cheap knock-offs of a major property, only made in the States.

    My biggest memory from seeing this movie on retro TV wasn’t any detail from the movie itself, but that I was already pretty shook up when I turned it on–just a half hour before I got back in, some drunken fratboys threw their bottles at me while I was walking home. 

  • Hmm. My question is, why didn’t they make the other actress playing an Amazon play Wonder Woman, and cast the blonde as the traitor? The brunette is much prettier, and, well…she’s a brunette. o_0

    Hmm.

  • Time for some trivia that didn’t make it into the review!

    One of this movie’s producers wrote a memoir (he was also involved with shows like Gunsmoke and Simon & Simon), and he devotes an entire chapter to Wonder Woman. The chapter is called, and I’m not kidding about this, “I Produce TV’s Worst Ninety-Minute Movie of the Week”.

    The book is up on Google Books, and here are some fun facts I gleaned from the free preview:

    – The producer knew the movie would be horrible before it even started shooting, due to the director taking the subject matter deadly seriously.
    – Nick Nolte almost got the part of Steve Trevor, but the network didn’t like him.

    – The director told Cathy Lee Crosby she couldn’t have sex with anyone or do drugs for the duration of the shoot, because she had to live a pure life like Wonder Woman.

    All these amazing facts and more can be found here: http://bit.ly/WI0SnX

  • MichaelANovelli

    Finally got around to watching this…

    *clears throat*

    A REVIEW WITH HOT BISEXUAL ACTION AND *I* WASN’T WRITTEN INTO THE SCRIPT?  Have you not seen my show?  I’m The Goddamn Leatherbear!

    Well, now I must kill you all…

    • lol… Sorry, when I thought of hot bisexual action, my mind immediately went to the Porn Critic. Well, now you know how Joshua felt when you left him out of the Agony Anarchists. 🙂

  • robert roy

    good review sofie and you nostalgia critic retruns that was epic and i love the renegado cameo

    • Yeah, good review, Sofie. (????????)

      • Sofie Liv

         Don’t ask me.. maybe my stunning performance of your material was enough that I should have full credit?

        Cause that’s how it works right? the main actors should have all recognision.

  • kenny

    Ricardo Montalban was the best paRT OF THAT MOVIE!