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on Tuesday, February 19, 2013
It's the premiere of What We Had to Watch, where your host Il Neige braves the cinematic dangers that lie just beyond the fourth wall to critique the best and worst of 21st century filmmaking! In his Agony Booth debut, Il Neige takes a look at the fantasy adventure Eragon, a film based on a book written by a kid, for kids. It's the Kidz Bop of Fantasy Literature!
Atlas Shrugged II: The Strike (2012)
“It’s safe to say that with its stilted acting, clumsy dialogue, and TV movie-level cinematography, Atlas Shrugged II is Objectively bad.”The Lord of the Rings (1978)
"Luckily for him, Tolkien died before this movie was made. Had he seen it, I've little doubt he would have hunted down and personally killed everyone responsible for this monstrosity."Twilight (2008)
"No matter how good of a job the director did, and no matter how hard the screenwriters worked, nobody else's talent is ever going to fix the middle-aged woman's disturbing sparkly wank-dream that is Twilight."The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009)
“My prediction at the end of my Twilight recap was correct: This movie did indeed suck harder than its predecessor. In fact, it sucked so hard that it made me wonder why I ever liked the first one to begin with.”The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones (2013)
“If the source novel didn’t start out as Twilight fanfic, I’ll drop dead of shock.”The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013)
“Catching Fire is a far superior, more adult film than The Hunger Games, as we see the young characters we recognize from the first film grow into the people that could potentially help shape a new world. In particular, we watch as Katniss begins to believe in the power she could wield, and we wonder if this mockingjay has finally spread her wings.”
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