Jul 14, 2014
Indiana Is Your New Gayest State Today! Hooray!
There are so many gay states in the union, but today Indiana is the gayest of all! That’s because a federal judge struck down Indiana’s same-sex marriage ban. And the Hoosiergays (this is their name) have ALREADY STARTED MARRYING!
Marion County Clerk Beth White said she is prepared to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples in her office at the City-County Building in Downtown Indianapolis.
“Chief Judge Richard Young’s decision on marriage equality sets forth a clear course of action for this office to follow regarding same-sex marriage licenses. It is my responsibility to uphold court rulings that impact this office and that is what I will do,” White said in a release.
Craig Bowen and Jake Miller were the first couple to get their marriage license and be married in Indianapolis.
This is just the best! Now in Indiana people can be so gay no matter what they are doing. And what do people do in Indiana, you ask? I’ll tell you! They go to (gay) basketball games. They shuck (gay) corn. They raise (gay) cattle. They (gay) wrestle. They (gay) strike down stupid bans. They go to excellent (gay) schools. They are (gay) friendly. They listen to (gay) songs about little pink houses for you and me, whoooo, for you and me! I’m even going to Indiana soon, on a visit, SPECIFICALLY TO TELL JOKES AND DO COMMUNITY SERVICE FOR GAY TEENS WHO NOW CAN GET MARRIED WHEN THEY (GAY) GROW UP!
Now, it is true that this site issued a fatwa against saying on Facebook that one’s husband is THE BEST HUSBAND, but it is lifted for all Indiana gays and lesbians, who should be able to brag about husbands and wives and genderqueer partners today and every day. Why? BECAUSE WE MAKE THE RULES and that is how things go. Also, just look at this site. Do you really think we WOULDN’T give special preference to gays? C’mon.