Season finale time! Jane goes into labor while her mom kinda sorta accidentally gets married, and the evil drug kingpin Sin Rostro finally makes herself relevant to the whole pregnancy plotline.
The season finale of Arrow is just around the corner, but first: Oliver heads back to Starling City to murder Nyssa, Team Arrow learns to let go, and Black Canary tries out her new toy.
This week on Once Upon a Time’s dramatic two-part season finale, the Author proved himself to be the crappiest alt-world fanfiction writer ever. Snow White got a new, even worse haircut. (Yes, it is possible!) A few people died, then un-died. A long-awaited “I love you” was exchanged. Old Dirty Homeless-Looking Mickey remained Old Dirty and Homeless-Looking, then died and stayed dead. And Storybrooke got both a new Author and a brand new Lord Assholes.
It’s the third to last Mad Men: Joan gets a new partner and makes Hobart an offer. Roger and Peggy share a special moment and both display hidden talents. Don goes on a road trip and encounters someone from his past.
“And maybe I’m too jaded by Mirror Universe episodes by now, but I’m not at all surprised they blew up the Enterprise, on a show called Enterprise.”
So no one told Jane life was going to be this way: her love life’s a joke, her novel is DOA, and she has a high school reunion to go to.
GAME OF THRONES: Population Control
Just in time for Mother’s Day, Once has gone and delivered us an hour filled with mother/daughter reunions, mother/daughter reconciliations, mother/daughter bonding sessions, and a fire-breathing dragon who burns people’s faces off . . . You know, the usual . . .
Dance Moms is awful. Yes, Abby Lee Miller is the worst. Yes, I know all that drama is scripted. Yes, it’s awful that talented little girls are being exploited by producers. But I really really like Dance Moms, you guys.
Barry sets a trap for Harrison while Joe tries to live Iris’s life for her, which is totally a dick move, but we’re really more worried about the whole Harrison thing, what with him secretly being a supervillain and all.
Wrestling comes to the Marbella! It’s Petra vs. Jane, Xiomara vs. Rogelio, and Rafael vs. Luisa! Get your bets in now!
Hijinks ensue when it looks like an underling forgot to pay the rent. Roger gets ready to fire some ladies. The overlords at McCann have some news. Stan and Peggy bond over an abandoned child. And Don comes up with a plan to save the day!
This week’s Game of Thrones features Arya doing a little housekeeping, Sansa getting engaged again, Tommen getting a whole lot of nookie, Jon Snow getting a little head, Margaery beating Cersei in a verbal smackdown, and a High Septon being quite literally beaten by his religion.
This week on Once, Swan Queen road trips, car chases, kids who change nationalities when they become adults, a heart that gets tossed around like a hot potato, and a baby conceived under the creepiest circumstances ever.
This week on Arrow, Oliver gets a new name and a new job. Oh, and he totally gets laid, too. With Felicity. Plus, not everybody who was dead at the end of last episode is still dead at the end of this one. Eh, comic book TV shows, whatcha gonna do?
Let’s see how some of our favorite TV characters would fare on the world’s most ridiculous, guilty pleasure, summer reality game show . . . shall we?
This week on The Flash: so many secret identities, so little time. The Flash faces off with a villain who can be anyone, and Cisco discovers the true Harrison Wells. Plus, yet another Arrow crossover.
Elizabeth and Paige bond on a trip to see Grandma while Philip bonds with Sandra at EST. Oleg has good news for Stan. Philip gets Martha out of trouble at work, and Ronald Reagan makes a speech.
It’s “Spring Break Week” on Dancing With the Stars, and Team Dance Week to boot! So who gets booted–the bachelor, the diva, the millionaire, or the war hero?
Can Jane’s virginity survive a night of skinny dipping with Raphael? Will Xiomara’s relationship survive kissing another man? Can Petra survive being kidnapped by the not-really-dead Roman? Answers in this week’s Jane the Virgin!