This week, Ian McShane becomes Drew Barrymore’s character from Scream. Arya learns to develop a healthy fear of old people. The High Sparrow gets pervy. Everyone’s favorite “canine” character returns to make up for all those dead direwolves. And I choose a new favorite candidate for the Iron Throne.
THE AMERICANS: The Mail Robot Always Beeps Twice (S4 E12 Recap)
“I’m willing to risk it all to bring you this mini-recap, and find out if Top Gun is still on top after all these years.”
Leave your comments here about the new Agony Booth redesign.
This week, Bran fast forwards Warg DVR to reunite with a relative; Arya gives acting notes to a porn star; we meet Sam’s dad Archie Bunker; Tommen becomes the poster child for incest baby brain damage; and Dany gives her pregame speech while on a dragon, because walking is for pussies.
THE AMERICANS: The Curious Incident of the Mail Robot (S4 E11 Recap)
“The characters are all well acted and mostly well written; it’s just a pity that they all got sidelined not just for an action-disaster movie, but for a boring action-disaster movie.”
The big day is finally here! Jane is ready to marry Michael (and lose her v-card) but obstacles are in the way: she needs to change her thesis, Xiomara and Rogelio are fighting, and Rafael is secretly in love with her. Will Jane get to say ‘I do’? Or will the hijinks in Telenovela Land keep her from walking down the aisle?
In which Bran Stark, binge-watcher of Warg-DVR, taker of naps, tree-hanger-outer, RUINS EVERYTHING! Also, Sansa throws some much-awaited shade at Little Finger; Arya watches a porn version of Season 1 of GOT; and the winner of the Kingsmoot gets the medieval equivalent of a toilet bowl head-dunk swirly.
Philip shares a childhood memory with Paige. Oleg thinks Tatiana should try new things. Yung Hee can’t figure out what’s wrong with Don. Gabriel makes friends with a librarian. Gaad gets unexpected visitors. Pastor Tim runs out of gas.
“The third season finale ‘The Best of Both Worlds’ was not only a culmination of TNG’s third year; it was the culmination of what TNG had achieved by this point.”
“The movie deserves a reappraisal. Leaving aside the association with the cartoon and toy line, it’s a decent but not great sci-fi movie of the ‘80s.”
Sure we learned whodunit last week, but did he get any help — besides all the agents who were forced to do his bidding? This week the final secrets will be revealed, plus the final locker room scenes, as we say good-bye to all that and Quantico graduates another class.
In which everyone in Westeros experiences something more rare than a double rainbow or boobies that are completely immune to fire damage . . . a good day. Well, at least everyone whose name isn’t Osha, Nameless Dead Dothraki Dudes and Loras with the Bad Hair . . .
“Tony Stark is the most recurrent character in the Marvel Cinematic Universe at this point, and nobody has seemingly put the Earth in as much danger as he has without actively trying to.”
The war on magic starts today, folks! Until we decide that we actually like magic. Then, the war on magic ends. And we start a war against something else . . . people with multiple personality disorder, I think. Also, vanilla ice pops. We hate vanilla ice pops!
Philip and Stan play ball. The Jennings watch a very special television movie. Patty babysits. Paige drives. Pastor Tim plans for a trip. And William wonders why he never gets any vacation time.
Looks like we’ll finally find out whodunit in this penultimate Quantico episode, but will the answer satisfy or will it be even more of a drag than The Good Wife finale?
“Buying a movie ticket? Better call in sick to work. You’re gonna be on hold with three different departments, none of which seem to know the price of a ticket.”
It’s Baby Mateo’s first birthday but there’s too much drama in telenovela land to focus on the cute baby’s day. Petra and Jane compete for the better plan to bring Derek to justice while Michael tries to put himself back on the Sin Rostro/Mutter case. Also, Rogelio’s crew threatens to go on strike and ruin Jane’s upcoming wedding.