In which we meet a half-man/half-elephant, and Jupiter confesses her feelings for Caine in the most embarrassingly stupid way possible.
Author: Dr. Winston O'Boogie
Tripping on LSD causes Jackie Gleason to turn over a new leaf, while back on Groucho’s boat, we find out God’s fatal weakness: cooties.
“Red Faced” (S1 E06) Lois Lane’s dad comes to town and wants Supergirl to fight his idiotic-looking robot, the Red Tornado. Luckily, she’s angry enough to do it, but not half as angry as Red Tornado fans.
Some cut-up plastic milk jugs and $50 worth of red spray paint is all it takes to be a villain worthy of Supergirl. No wonder she’s so angry.
Jackie Gleason continues to trip on LSD and hallucinates a dancing Mickey Rooney and Zombie Arnold Stang, resulting in one of the most horrible GIFs ever perpetrated on humanity.
Hint: It involves people. Lots and lots of people. Oh, and get ready for the totally non-shocking reveal about why everyone is so interested in Jupiter.
“How Does She Do It?” (S1 E04) The episode they didn’t want you to see last week finally airs, and maybe it’s still a little too soon? Also, Supergirl faces her own cut-rate version of the Unabomber while watching Cat Grant’s son.
A week late, but still probably much too soon after Paris, we get bombs going off all over National City while Supergirl is supposed to be… babysitting. Sheesh.
Chuck and Lyle go commando on the CIA and are rewarded with all their dreams coming true: Namely, a government-funded live album and a girlfriend they can both share.
UPDATED on Nov. 22, 2015! “Casual fans today might be under the impression the episode resulted in boycotts, death threats, and people marching in the streets, but the contemporary record tells a different story.”
“Livewire” (S1 E05) Thanksgiving is the third week of November in National City, apparently, as Supergirl takes on a villain from the DCAU who becomes her lamest foe yet.
Someone said something mean about Supergirl on the radio! There’s only one thing that could mean – a fight to the death!
Jackie Gleason trips on LSD while Groucho Marx finally makes his grand, God-awful appearance.
Jupiter Ascending (2015): a recap (part 5 of 12): Caine is the perfect hunting (and dancing) machine
In which we learn the true origins of the human race, as well as Caine Wise’s tragic backstory, which is uncannily similar to a certain legendary bouncer.
“Fight or Flight” (S1 E03) Supergirl reveals to the world that she’s Superman’s cousin (which the world somehow didn’t already know) and becomes the target of an old Superman foe.
Every been really mad at someone so you go beat up their cousin? No? Then maybe you’re not supervillain material. But Reactron is!
‘Cause there ain’t no one for to give you no pain, except the makers of this movie. It’s the penultimate installment of Ishtar!
“Stronger Together” (S1 E02) Or, “Supergirl Relearns”. Supergirl causes an ecological disaster and realizes she sucks, so she enlists her friends to help her learn how to be a superhero… for the second time in as many weeks.
Superheroing is hard! But don’t worry, it’s nothing a training montage can’t fix. What do mean, we already did that last week?
Thrilling parking violation action, LSD-flavored envelopes, and another legendary actor is unlucky enough to appear in this movie.