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The Agonizer is a special section of the Agony Booth devoted to brief reviews of films that don't warrant a full-length recap and analysis, but yet are still painful in their own special ways. Also in this section, you might find the occasional article or interview if the mood strikes me.

Movie Review: Stone Cold (1991)
Stone Cold (1991)

"The bike crashes through the window... and right into the helicopter... which proceeds to go up in a huge fireball. Okay, maybe this film does have one thing Road House doesn't."

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TV Episode Review: Degrassi Junior High: "The Cover-Up"
Original Airdate: Sunday, February 8, 1987
Degrassi Junior High: "The Cover Up"

"Caitlin says they should try to get Rick to smile. Ooh, that sounds like a fantastic idea, doesn't it? And somehow, the writers were able to come up with a subplot even more insubstantial than the Voula-Steph animosity. At this point, I expect a subplot where Yick Yu debates whether or not to pick his nose in class."

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Heidi Montag's "Higher"
Heidi Montag

"It looks like Heidi Montag figured she could sing, and has released a song and video entitled 'Higher'. I suspect it's terrible, but I've already seen 'My Humps', so how bad could this be?"

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Razzie Predictions 2007 (The Final Chapter)
Razzie Predictions 2007 (The Final Chapter)

"If I have to sit through one more mediocre slasher flick, or one more laugh-free comedy, or one more lazy action flick, there's a high likelihood I'll snap and go on a shooting spree. It takes a lot for me to call a movie one of the worst I've ever seen, and only a few Razzie-nominated films this year even approached that designation. But each film on its own still amounted to about 5% of the pain one has to experience before scouting around town for the nearest clock tower."

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Endorsement: Lee L. Mercer, Jr. for President of the United States
Mercer for President 2008

"I'm backing Mr. Mercer for one simple reason: He represents everything the Agony Booth stands for. This site has a strong fondness for spectacular failures, and displays of complete insanity. And if Mr. Mercer is elected President, I can guarantee it will be the most spectacular and insane failure in the history of this great nation."

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Razzie Predictions 2007 (The Reckoning)
Razzie Predictions 2007 (The Reckoning)

"So, all totaled, I only guessed correctly slightly more than one-third of the time. I suppose it could have been worse, but I got tripped up by a lot of that 'outside the box' Razzie thinking. How was I supposed to know you could nominate four girls as a group to win Worst Actress? How could I have known that Eddie Murphy, by playing a female character, was eligible for Worst Actress? (I was frankly taking the whole Linda Hunt thing to heart in my decision-making process.) And 'any two actors from Bratz' for Worst Screen Couple? How is that even allowed?"

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