Mar 20, 2016
Zardoz (1974) (part 11 of 15)
Okay, about here is where I accepted that I’m just going to be completely lost for the rest of the movie. It’s still nighttime, and some of the Renegades come through a clearing. There’s lots of shouting and laughter, and we see some of the Apathetics throwing fruit at each other. Then the Renegades march past a naked Apathetic couple having sex on the lawn [!].
The woman, riding on top of the guy, stops and tugs the lead Renegade’s arm. “It’s a miracle!” she says. “We’re Apathetics!” Oh God, my head is hurting. The lead Renegade, by the way, is wearing a top hat and carrying a safety flare [!]. He’s being followed by a guy in a Dracula cape [!] and another guy with his face painted white [!]. Also among them is an unidentified person in a old bridal outfit [!], a Turn of the Century lace doily number, with the face completely covered by a veil.
“Tell us how, please!” Top Hat Guy cries. “We want some too!” Oh, I bet he wants some. Dracula and Bridal Outfit then come across a very naked Apathetic Chick getting ridden by Purple Chef Hat Guy. Helpfully, they’ve both left their chef hats on, but nothing else. “We started chasing the Brutal,” Apathetic Chick explains. “We got excited!” Yeah, we gathered.
She further explains, “We saw someone! We thought it was him!” Purple Chef Hat looks up and says, “It wasn’t! But we killed him anyway!” And I might end up saying this a lot for the rest of the recap, but please don’t feel bad if you’re lost. You’re not the only one.