Vaguely Liberal Crapsite ‘Upworthy’ Thinks You Are Hurting The Poor If You’re White And Eat Kale

kaleHere is the stupidest fucking thing I have seen today: vaguely liberal inspirational do-gooder site Upworthy.com thinks you are hurting the poor when you buy kale. To convince you of this, it has jacked all the illustrations (but not the even stupider commentary) from a month-old post at Bitch.

Let’s discuss Bitch, because they should know better:

Last month, I sounded off about the new Whole Foods campaign rebranding collard greens as the next big superfood. Their efforts have resulted in public backlash over cultural appropriation and the rising costs of food—a phenomenon writer Mikki Kendall succinctly dubbed “food gentrification.”

And what is “food gentrification”?

At times, food gentrification and neighborhood gentrification can be seen to work in tandem, as in cases where community gardens have attracted wealthier residents to working class neighborhoods. Whether it’s the fetishization of hole-in-the-wall restaurants, twerking, or Sriracha, the gentrification cycle has birthed the momentary relevance of countless ideas and materials. Their blip on the mainstream radar is at once both novel and tragic; typecast Cuban groceries and Korean BBQ joints function as both pawn and king in the game of conspicuous consumption that manifests through venues ranging from Instagram to the Academy Awards.

So poor neighborhoods should not have community gardens because then rich white people might move in and take their shit. Also, if white people eat Korean barbecue, then that is bad, because “reason.” GO FUCK YOURSELF, AMERICAN MELTING POT AND AMERICAN SALAD BOWL. If your people were from Scotland, then it is haggis for you!

Got it, makes sense, carry on!

Unfortunately for families of modest means who want to eat organic food, the prohibitively high cost of such goods makes them all but inaccessible.

That is extremely true. But the nice thing about produce, especially organic produce, is that the more you sell of it, the more you can afford to plant more organic produce! It is not actually a finite comestible, at least until the Central Valley goes the way of the Gobi desert.

[Fact fact fact, so many facts, excised for you, the reader]

Organic foods are practically inaccessible to families who receive SNAP benefits, which are doled out according to official USDA estimates of how much it costs to feed a family per week. For a family of four, the cost of a week’s worth of (non-organic) groceries is now a minimum of $145.20, and at the current rate of increase would reach $200 by 2024

That is also true! Let’s all vote for people who will stop cutting SNAP benefits please, and also people who will do something about jobs, and let’s definitely vote for people who will institute a maximum wage in this country, for fucking real.

Now where does white people eating kale fit into this?

Oh, it was that illo up top, showing that the price of a bunch of kale has risen from .88 to $1.10 over the past four years, at the same time it’s available in 12 times as many stores, presumably to at least 12 times as many people. The inflation rate for kale has certainly outstripped that of other stuff, since “other stuff” only increased by five percent.

It does not, in fact, sound as though white people eating kale has reduced the affordability of it hardly at all!

We at Happy are very sympathetic to food insecurity, to food deserts, to the lack of delicious nutritious ingredients in too many neighborhoods. We are wholeheartedly behind Michelle Obama on that, and think her leadership on the issue is incredibly important for our national health, especially for poor children.

But let’s get fucking real. While it is just about impossible to feed your family on SNAP benefits alone, twenty-eight cents four times a month is ONE DOLLAR. A MONTH.

Shut the fuck up, Bitch Mag and Upworthy.

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