Last time: Henry and his clone finally met in the catacombs under Budapest and the verbal altercation turned physical, with the pair going through a bone-infested wall and falling into a pool of water below.
Danny follows in the wake…
Last time: We discovered the clone’s name is “Junior” and has been raised by Clay Varris. Henry discovered the news and… took it rather well. Yuri gave him the skinny on Clay’s master plan to create super soldiers, expecting Henry…
Last time: Henry met his younger self. It did not go well.
Henry’s in jail and looking pretty dejected. I guess if you just got your ass handed to you by somebody half your age and got stuck in a…
Last time: Elite soldier Henry Gordon decided to retire after an assassination, feeling he was losing his touch. Then an old war buddy of his named Jack told Henry his target had been an innocent man. After uncovering the fact…
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“Development hell” is a term describing films in various stages of production that for one reason or another have hit a wall. Perhaps there’s problems with the script, or it’s discovered the budget will be too high. Perhaps producers or…
Another new year and another January are upon us, and I think by now we all know what that means. Here to predict which of these (mostly long-delayed) films will be HITs (unlikely) and which will BOMB are Thomas…
It’s October, and since Halloween lasts an entire month nowadays, that means plenty of dark, gothic, creepy, and emo films are on the release schedule. Here to determine which of this month’s movies will put a scare into audiences (or…
Even though it’s a rare month with absolutely no comic book superheroes in sight, we’ve still got a plenty of potential blockbusters to evaluate as we decide which will be HITs and which will BOMB based solely on the…
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Well, we got through Suicide Squad. If you just started reading this recap here, I’ll let Superman sum the movie up for you:
But despite Suicide Squad’s banal ugliness, its addled editing, its incoherent characterizations, its risible villain, and its…
A while ago on Suicide Squad: The most useful member of the team found his cojones, only to sacrifice them (and everything else) to kill Enchantress’s brother “Chester”, whose real name I never heard even once. But Enchantress’s machine…
Antecedently on Suicide Squad: The chips are down for our plucky band of felons. Waller’s been kidnapped and mind-probed. Joker’s escape attempt went awry; he got in a helicopter crash *snicker* and he’s *snort* totally…
Heretofore on Suicide Squad: Our titular Squad began their first big assignment: to travel to Gotham Central Star National Fawcett Coast Keystone Gorilla Midway City and rescue an unidentified person from a brother/sister duo of omnipotent wizards who are wrecking…
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Erstwhile on Suicide Squad: Amanda Waller’s cunning plan to engineer a romance between an ultra-powerful witch and the single person guarding her somehow ran into problems. Enchantress slipped her leash and went rogue, releasing her brother from his Pier…
Precedingly on Suicide Squad: Waller’s getting the band together. Harley Quinn’s pimp is coming to her rescue. Enchantress is off the leash and up to no good.
Enchantress teleports by wrapping her cloud of bodily funk around her. Her…
Previously on Suicide Squad: Government stooge (and three-time Detective Wyms Cosplay Contest runner-up) Amanda Waller wanted to protect America from a hypothetical terrorist threat by a Superman-type figure. To that end, she assembled a team of lame-o supervillains with…
Last time on Suicide Squad: The Wall got an idea.
An awful idea.
The Wall got a wonderful, awful idea.
She’s smiling because, with Superman dead, it’s the perfect time to pitch this wonderful, awful idea to her fellow…
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The DC Expanded Universe: four cursed words if ever there were any.
The twelve hours that comprise the DCEU represent such a pathetically inept wall-to-wall pooch-screw that dunking on the franchise at this point seems almost mean, like laughing at…
It’s the eve of the release of Marvel’s Black Panther, widely expected to break multiple box office records, not the least of which being the biggest superhero film of all time starring a black lead. In the tradition of…
December is the time of the year that brings yule tidings, whatever the hell those are, along with the studio's most family-friendliest blockbusters and their most Oscar-batiest of awards contenders. The release of another Star Wars film is imminent and looms large over this month's releases, but there are still plenty of other films vying for your hard-earned ticket dollars this December.
Maybe I'm being too generous, but I think in light of the context that Suicide Squad was made in, it did the best it could with what it had, but really, it was capable of so much more.
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