Patrons get an ad-free experience and full access to our archives. Support the Agony Booth for as little as $1/month!

Click here for more details.

Tagged: Keanu Reeves

· by Dr. Winston O'Boogie · Jan 3, 2019

Hit or Bomb? January 2019 movie predictions

It’s January, Hollywood’s usual dumping ground for lackluster movies, and this year might be the Januariest January in recent memory. Despite a paltry slate consisting mostly of films you can’t believe didn’t go straight to streaming, our box office gurus…

· by Dr. Winston O'Boogie · Feb 2, 2017

Hit or Bomb? February 2017 movie predictions

Another new month is upon us, meaning it’s the time when I would normally go into a long-winded spiel about the kinds of movies you can expect over the next few weeks, but I think we all know the drill:…

Movies / Series Review / Text

· by Steven Birkner · Jul 18, 2016

The Matrix, Revisited: 50% of a great trilogy

“...By which I mean the greatness rests in the first one and half of Reloaded. Matrix: Revolutions contains 0% greatness, 40% stupidity, and 60% boredom.”

Movie Review / Movies / Text

· by Rob Kirchgassner · Aug 27, 2015

Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1992)

“This film has an even more misleading title than Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan.”

Movie Review / Movies / Text

· by Chelsey McQuitty · Oct 22, 2014

Constantine (2005)

“It’s difficult enough for newbies to grasp exactly who Constantine is and what he does without throwing in all these other side characters and unnecessary plot twists.”

Agonizer / Text

· by Rick Lewis · Aug 19, 2014

Tuesday in the blurbs

Tuesday in the blurbs

Movie Review / Movies / Text

· by Dr. Winston O'Boogie · Jul 22, 2013

A Scanner Darkly (2006)

“Compared to most adaptations of the works of legendary sci-fi author Philip K. Dick (Total Recall, Blade Runner, Next, to name just a few), the animated film A Scanner Darkly is extremely faithful to its source material. But that’s not necessarily a good thing.”

Movie Review / Movies / Videos

· by Unusual Suspect · Sep 2, 2012

VIDEO: The Matrix (1999)

Keanu Reeves is a hacker who learns he's living inside a virtual reality simulation, and joins in a rebellion against his machine overlords in The Matrix, which gives the Suspect a total nerd-gasm. Watch as he shows his admiration for this kick-ass sci-fi action classic in his usual way: by ridiculing the shit out of it!

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 11 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 10 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 9 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 8 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 7 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 6 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 5 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 4 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 3 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 2 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.

Movie Recap / Movies / Text

· by Mark "Scooter" Wilson · Jan 26, 2009

The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008) (part 1 of 11)

For the role of an alien incapable of feeling emotions, they cast the Hollywood actor least capable of expressing them.