The Cast of Characters:
(Christopher Reeve). The big blue boy scout is lured back for one last adventure, fighting his most evil villain yet: the two-headed Golan-Globus monster. For no particular reason, he decides one day to rid the world of all nuclear weapons. Amazingly, the leaders of the world couldn’t be happier.
(Margot Kidder). Superman’s girlfriend. Well, maybe. Superman dicks her around once again, generally shunning her in favor of a younger woman until he needs her guidance in the field of international politics. He reveals his secret identity to her… then makes her forget it a few minutes later. Psych!
(Gene Hackman). Superman’s arch-nemesis. Exploits an international crisis, kinda, so he can make lots of money. He once again tries to defeat Superman, this time by creating the lamest supervillain ever. Yes, even lamer than the Jeweler
(Jon Cryer). Lex’s idiot nephew. Essentially, Duckie in a Superman movie.
(Sam Wanamaker). Overblown caricature of an evil media mogul. Buys out the Daily Planet and turns it into a sleazy tabloid. Currently trying to come up with clever ways to merge the names “Superman” and “Lois Lane”. Superlane? Loisman?
(Mariel Hemingway). Warfield’s daughter, which is why she’s eventually appointed publisher of the Daily Planet. Serves no real purpose, other than being a mild romantic interest for Clark, and a human MacGuffin to propel the final fight sequences.
(Mark Pillow). The greatest villain Superman has ever faced, and a terrifying being with immense powers to make the entire world tremble. Which is how I would describe Darkseid. Meanwhile, here’s Nuclear Man! The most retarded supervillain ever! And by that, I mean he is literally retarded
Can you believe it? Another Superman movie is about to be released. After twenty long years, and an insane, tortured production history (described in detail on this very site, in a forum post that completely melted down the server when Slashdot got hold of it), Superman Returns is finally here.
In honor of this occasion, I decided to take a look at the last Superman movie, Superman IV: The Quest for Peace, a movie so utterly catastrophic that (just like Superman III, also recapped here) Superman Returns director Bryan Singer chose to completely ignore it when picking up the Superman saga. (Reportedly, the new film is a pseudo-sequel to the first two films, and the other two thankfully never happened.)
I also decided it was time to try something new. Because there are several moments in this movie that I can’t do justice with mere words, for the very first time, I’ll be including video clips from the movie, hosted by YouTube. Since this is sort of an experiment for me, you may experience technical difficulties while viewing a video clip. If that happens, rest assured that I’ll be doing my best to get it working again.