Star Trek (TAS) “Albatross” (part 3 of 4)

Enterprise approaches Dramia II and passes through an aurora. Sulu reports the radiation levels are “intense!” but Spock says they’re non-lethal. Oh, so it’s that safe radiation I’ve heard so much about. Kirk, Spock, and Deimos prepare to beam down to the planet.

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

And look, Scotty’s been promoted to captain. Congrats, Scotty!

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The trio beam down to the surface.

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

And it looks like Dramia II is another name for Detroit. I think I can make out Tiger Stadium in the background. The trio hears scuttling, and Deimos pulls his piece, saying the locals don’t like outsiders. Spock says that surely Deimos wouldn’t be considered an outsider since he’s Dramian. Deimos says the difference is not that, but between the living and the walking dead.

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

I would pay real money to see a Star Trek zombie movie.

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

Oh. Right. I forgot, I did pay real money to see a Star Trek zombie movie.

The trio chase one of the survivors into a cave and Kirk is attacked.

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

And look! It’s another Vulcan super power: the ability to stretch arms like Dhalsim from Street Fighter! I wanna see Spock breathe Yoga Fire now!

After dragging the sad bastard off of Kirk, Deimos explains these people were not the ones who survived McCoy’s plague, but rather they are the people who came back to the planet after it hit. Devastated by the loss of so many loved ones, they all became cave dwelling head cases. And Deimos’ people just… left them there to wallow in their misery and squalor among the corpses. And McCoy is still the monster.

But wait! A figure emerges from the shadows!

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

“Coltai survived!” the being says, “By what miracle, I do not know.” Kirk asks if Coltai remembers McCoy. Coltai explains McCoy treated him for Saurian virus, and further goes on to say that, “One that heals, does not kill.” Hah! Coltai’s never heard of Doctor McNinja.

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

Coltai is willing to come back with Kirk and Co. to testify on McCoy’s behalf, and the four beam back up. After yet more beauty shots of Enterprise flying through space, Kirk calls down to Sickbay and asks Spock how Colllltai (that’s the way Shatner says it. My theory is Shatner got so bored reading his lines sometimes that he did this just to break the tedium) is doing. Spock reports that he’s clean, well-fed, and resting…

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

…in his old filthy clothes. Man, couldn’t they have sprung for a pair of coveralls or something? If it’d been me, I would’ve burned those clothes to get rid of the space lice. Kirk says, “Good! We want him to be a sterling witness!” His rags will be pristine, Jim. Christine is looking after Coltai, and I have to admit, I’m missing the inflatable Doctor McCoy we saw in earlier episodes. You’re going to have to read all my earlier recaps to get that joke. No, I’m not going to tell you which recap it’s in, so don’t ask.

Yet more shots of Enterprise flying through space… And oh, here’s that aurora that gives off that intense non-lethal radiation!

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

I sure am glad that exposure to it won’t hurt anyone, and that it won’t somehow factor into this plot. And then, in a twist that surprises no one, Colllltai turns blue!

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

Kirk comes down to Sickbay to check him out, and tells Nurse Chapel to set up an immediate quarantine. For all the good that’s going to do. Coltai probably ran into a dozen people on the way to Sickbay, Scotty included. Although I could see Scotty’s perpetual inebriation providing some sort of immunity. Kirk says they have to save Collllltai, and Deimos needles him, suggesting it’s just to save McCoy. Kirk claims they place a value on all life. Deimos looks surprised, and Kirk says, “Does that shock, you, Commander?” Then Spock says, “Captain, you’re… blue.” Of course he‘s blue, Spock! McCoy’s life is in jeopardy and Coltai is dying!

Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross" (part 3 of 4)

Oh. Literally blue. Looking at this, I can’t help but wonder if this entire episode was inspired by someone messing up the coloration on some animation cells and someone else saying, “Hey, I got a great idea for an episode!”

Multi-Part Article: Star Trek (TAS) "Albatross"

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