Snarketing: Buick engages in self-abuse, makes you watch

Marketing Snarketing

You probably think the target demo for Buick is the same as Metamucil-flavored hard candy, and Buick couldn’t agree with you more.

That’s why their new commercial is so desperate to convince you that the new Buick sedan is every bit as sexy as a Hyundai Sonata or, dare I say, a Mazda6. Oh my!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DNW_U_cDYTc

The ad is filled with actors saying – What Buick? Where is a Buick? I don’t see a Buick… One person is looking directly at the car but seems unable to process that a Buick might be anything but a rusty shit bucket with its left turn signal on.

Is that the daily experience you can expect in a new Buick? Constantly reassuring your friends and family that you didn’t steal a Buick emblem and krazy glue it to an Altima? “THAT’S NOT A BUICK!” yells one grandmother. “That’s what I told him!” answers her 147-year-old friend.

Besides having to watch a McDonalds commercial in order to watch this Buick commercial on YouTube, you know what really ticks me off? General Motors was convinced by some marketing agency that their luxury line was so god-awful ugly before that people WON’T EVEN RECOGNIZE IT NOW! In fact, these new Buicks are so different that anyone with a 2012 LaCrosse can go fuck themselves. Buick disowns you, grandma.

Fine, it’s a Buick. I believe you. In fact, the only thing I have trouble believing is the name-brand article is the narrator. Kevin Bacon, really? Does that mean I’m just a Buick away from being one degree from Kevin Bacon???

Still probably not worth it.

(For more self-loathing from Buick, check out this 1990 classic. Message: We’re not the best or even close to the best, but we’re as close to it as you’re going to get in American car, so suck it up.)

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  • guppy06

    Are you not yet ready for a car with an FM radio, or any other audio technology that can play something other than “Franky” or “Dean-o?”Do you need a car with a trunk big enough to carry both a set of golf clubs and (most of) an FBI informant?Do you want a car that inexplicably comes straight from the factory smelling like a cigar?Nope, can’t see how Buick might have any sort of image problem at all!(What next, trying to sell BMW’s to non-douches?)

  • M H

    I’ve seen this ad enough on Rachel Maddow to notice it recently has been re-edited so that the first couple we see is Vaguely Hispanic. The VH couple, however, does not appear in any other scene in the ad – breaking what I think is a Chekhovian rule.

  • ryp

    Fuck GM – they get rid of Pontiac – the 3rd best selling brand of the 1960s – GTO, Firebird, Tempest, LeMans, Grand Prix – a brand easily revamped to appeal to a young demographic and base retro muscle car designs on, and they keep Buick. If they really want anyone under 80 to buy a Buick – they need to:1) Bring back the Roadmaster as a luxury sedan with a badass shark face grill and headlights as a nod to the 49-53 models. 2 Bring back the Wildcat as a smaller high performance hatchback that does NOT look like a deformed bubble or bar of soap.3) Bring back the Riviera as a sleek mid-size with high end accessories and “appointments”, and with a boat- tail and a curved rear window. And everything better have the cosmetic vents on the front fenders!