VIDEO: Shark Night 3D (2011)

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Cecil takes on a horror-thriller with the unfair rep of being one of the worst films of 2011, Shark Night 3D! From the director of The Final Destination and Snakes on a Plane, this movie follows a group of college kids (including Sara Paxton and Katharine McPhee, who fortunately spend most of the move in bikinis, but unfortunately never less than that, because this movie is PG-13) as they go on the perfect vacation, only to find out they’re being fed to sharks by a group of rednecks intent on making awesome internet videos!

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  • edharris1178

    Good review as always, man.  

    • Cecil_Trachenburg

       Thanks Ed 🙂

  • FullofQuestions1

    Good review!
    On the topic of the saltwater lake-that is plausible if the salt concentration is similar enough to that of an ocean. I do however feel that it would’ve made more sense AND caused more paranoia to have freshwater and have the shark be a bull shark (they can survive for some time in freshwater). Plus, they’re really aggressive.

    Sorry about the tangent; I just find sharks really cool.

    While I do think I’ll stick to movies like Jaws, your talking about this film does make it look somewhat less silly and like a decent movie.

    On another side note, why can’t we have movies with this premise, only about jellyfish? I mean, just reading about box jellyfish is enough to make me paranoid.

    • Cecil_Trachenburg

      Thank you 🙂

      I honestly don’t know too much about sharks so they could have made up just about anything and chances are I would have believed them. They did have a bull shark in the movie and I’m pretty sure it did most of the killing.

      Jaws is by far one of the best movies ever made but I think it is unfair that people compare a movie like this to that. It’s like comparing Sniper to Saving Private Ryan. Yes they are both war movies but they are completely different. I think if you go in with an open mind you should enjoy it.

      Ugh, jellyfish. The Man-o-war is brutal. I got stung by one (a regular jellyfish) years ago and it felt like I was on fire. Very unpleasant. I think there is potential there but most likely something like this would end up on Scifi channel.

  • Sofie Liv

    So does that mean you are all for more Sharktopus films?

    you really do like silly movies X) 

    • Cecil_Trachenburg

      Please bring on more Sharktopus! I grew up with the giant monster movies like Godzilla and Gamera, so this is just more of that. (to a degree)

      I certainly do. I am a weird one. 😛

      • Sofie Liv

         So what you would really be looking for is “Mega Sharktopus vs Dinosaur-Kong.” two giant monsters battling around while the tiny humans just runs around in circles… we should totally make that movie… 

        • Ed Wong Hau Wuncler IV

          I could audition for the career-defining role of crazy running man #3!

          • MephLord

             I’d be the mime.  We’d also need the mother with stroller, macho jerk, debutante with her mother and unlikely hero to fill out the cliche characters.

          • Cecil_Trachenburg

            don’t forget escaped inmate, nerd, and oversexed jock

          • Sammy

            Dibs on the insane scientist who injects himself with the Mega Sharktopus and DinoKong serums, only to be defeated in pitched battle when the real ones show up again.

          • Cecil_Trachenburg

            That sounds like a three picture deal with The Asylum.

          • MephLord

            Bill Paxton would be a great escaped inmate, Kurt Angle (the wrestler) could be the oversexed jock and a great nerd would be James Rolfe 😀

          • Cecil_Trachenburg

            A winning combination!

          • Cecil_Trachenburg

            lol, considering we’d need a few dozen of them sure

        • Cecil_Trachenburg

          If I had the money, I would so make that movie. 🙂

          • Sofie Liv

             Well, then remember the day you win the lottery, the idea was mine! I claim copy-right and I will only give up them in ex-change for the part of unlikely hero whom by the end of the day ends up very heroically driving through all the chaos, spitting out clichéd moral lessons about love and war and yet still ends up some-how killing the two giant monsters.. I have no idea how…. you are the monster expert you you figure it out..

            And then at last, the bogus speech. “two of the worlds biggest miracle.. lost, and always under-appreciated and miss-understood”

            To which running man #3 mutters. “Miss-understood..? the bloody thing murdered, rampaged. It killed my family you idiot!”

            This script I sense is a work of genius, no one would be able to turn it down. TO THE ASYLUM MOVIES! how can they say no? the plan is brilliant… or maybe not, but the idea is fun X) 

          • FullofQuestions1

            Am I the only one who thinks that “Sharktopus” sounds like the name of a hentai (I know what it actually is)?

          • Sofie Liv

            Pff, that’s one messed up hentai!

            I’m confused are you saying you know what Sharktopus is or that you don’t know?

            Well.. erh, I can tell it’s one of the infamous “Asylum movies.” which are movies all about either ripping up big blockbusters and make them a lot cheaper and a lot sillier (Sherlock holmes fights a dinosaur!)  or just come with the most outlandish premises you can to just go for it and make it big, silly and very cheap. Sharktopus is of cause one of their great success stories where the concept of a Shark merged with an octopus killing off a bunch of bikini models gets its time in the lamp light..

            And on some level I can’t help but kind of appreciate the Asylum for what it is and what it does.. You never get deep movies from them, that’s not the concept nor the idea, you just get as many “Wtf just happened?!” movies as possible.

          • Cecil_Trachenburg

            Not to be nitpicky but Sharktopus is actually Star/Anchor Bay, not Asylum. It was released under their tag of “Roger Corman presents” and is a step up from Asylum. The effects and story, while bad, are much more solid than Asylum movies. Being affiliated with Corman also got them a bigger budget, probably about twice of an Asylum picture.

          • Cecil_Trachenburg

            I know things! lol 😛

          • Sofie Liv

             Ah, okay. My mistake, I just assumed. Cause the movie still looks kind of cheap and it is a rather outlandish Asylum-ish premise.

            But you’re the expert on these areas, ask about fantasy or superhero movies and I will probably know more X)

          • Cecil_Trachenburg

            Oh, its still cheap and cheesy but the production is not quite as bad as a typical Asylum picture.

            Yes I think we all can agree I am the master of bad cinema. 🙂

            I was quite impressed with your knowledge of Sherlock Holmes. ^^

          • Sofie Liv

            Thanks 🙂

            Well, ask me about the right subject and I turn into an expert.
            I am kind of a geek that way. 

          • Cecil_Trachenburg

            Given the nature of hentai, I’m sure something like that exists.

          • Cecil_Trachenburg

            I would gladly direct an Asylum movie. They usually crank them out in about 2 weeks for roughly $25k. They own their FX house who works on each movie until they are told to stop and move on to the next one. They have it down to a science as far as what they need to put in movies. (monsters, explosions, girls, etc)

            I have about 4 weeks of vacation and if I was ever asked to do one (they usually contact you on say…a friday to ask if you can start directing on monday) I would jump at the chance. Gotta get those credits started somewhere.

            I will say for as terrible as many of them are they have been getting better. I would be curious to see what they could do if they actually had maybe an extra few weeks to work on the films.

          • Sofie Liv

             I would gladly work on a asylum movie as well, and do it for free, it sounds like a lot of fun.
            And yeah! we do need to get the beginners credit from some-where, I see no shame in that at all.

            Well, maybe they will get a little more time. you know it’s all about that they have already calculated how much money they are going to make from the movies so they need to create them to a smaller budget than that.
            But they are starting to become kind of cult, so many the geek audience will indeed expand, I don’t know.

            In either case, I cannot help but appreciate that they are there, there’s just some-thing awesome about that X) 

  • MephLord

    I like creature feature movies, especially when they are funny and outlandish (such as Python vs Boa and Lake Placid) so this looks like something I’d enjoy. 

    • Cecil_Trachenburg

      Exactly. This is just silly entertainment with some CGI instead of guys in rubber suits. If you go in knowing it is campy and silly you should have no problem enjoying it.

  • filmguy450

    I love campy, fun “bad” films, but was very disappointed here- A) It’s PG-13; it needed more gore, etc. B) I felt Ellis didn’t bring much to the table this go round. There was no vibe to the film really. C) I thought it took itself too seriously (where’s my “I’m sick and tired of these motherf**king snakes…” type line). D) Aside from the fantastic Sarah Paxton, I hated everyone else. Good review though.

    • Cecil_Trachenburg

      Thanks, glad you enjoyed the episode. While the movie probably would have benefitted from being more in line with Snakes on a Plane, I still thought it had its own vibe that worked for me. I do get that it isn’t for everyone, I just didn’t get the massive amount of hate I was seeing for it. There is far, far worse out there.

  • Barbara LeMaster

    I Netflixed this film recently and, while I was expecting the typical SyFy movie of the week, I was pleasantly surprised at how much I liked this film.  For some reason, I was amused at the different species of shark all living in the same lake.  I figured one shark would be enough.

    • Cecil_Trachenburg

      I also liked that they mixed it up with the different species of shark. To me, it helped to keep it a bit fresh and make it stand out from 90% of other shark movies that usually just go all great white.

  • Sand Ripper

    I didn’t watch this review until now, because I didn’t want to see any spoilers since I hadn’t seen the movie yet.

    Finally got around to watching the movie the other day. Rented it from the cheapie rack at the corner video store.

    It’s really not a bad movie at all. It wasn’t scary and the sharks looked mostly fake, but I thought that overall it was decent and had some good scenes. Then again, I’m an easy mark for anything that has a shark in it… 😉