VIDEO: Rubber (2010)

by · September 2, 2011

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Mr. Mendo teams up with the mysterious reviewer known only as The Omega for Rubber, the world’s first movie about a self-aware rubber tire with the ability to psychically make people’s heads explode, also starring a self-aware Greek chorus of spectators who watch the film from inside itself.

This movie doesn’t just sit atop the fourth wall; it crashes right through it. Which makes this episode of Hack Attack the perfect occasion for a surprise guest star (or two)…

For more of the Omega’s videos, visit TheOmegaGeek.com! For more of the Man in Black’s videos, check out Man in Black Reviews!

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  • Michael A. Novelli

    Ah, double digits at last! It’s smooth sailing from here, me hearties!

  • I might get less mention time, but the other guy doesn’t get a link! 😉 Thanks for that, by the way.

  • Handsome Pete

    Omega = MarzGurl?

    • Anon

      Omegas another reviewer. Shes dating Diamanda Hagan from tgwtg

      • TheOmegaGeek

        Indeed, I am. This adds another reviewer to the list of people I’ve been suspected of being. 🙂

  • Cristiona

    An evil tire. Wow. And I thought killer refrigerators and beds were the bottom of the barrel.

    • Michael A. Novelli

      I know, right? Still, if I ever manage to find a copy of The Gingerdead Man…

  • George

    Definitely need to see this movie now then.

  • Michael A. Novelli

    Speaking of Marzgurl, now I just have to get her, and my list of all the original guests I lined up last year will be complete…

  • cyberjohn

    really good review it actually depresses that so many people raved about this movie, I mean if they cut out the all the meta shit it might have been half decent

    • Cristiona

      Sounds like it also would have been about 20 minutes long.

      • Michael A. Novelli

        I think twelve is more likely, if you just stuck with the actual plot…

  • Michael A. Novelli

    Well, you have to remember, we’ve reached a point in the film press where “weird=good” it seems…

  • Olaf_the_Lofty

    Well, the film is clearly insane. I suspect that the fourth wall stuff is just there as padding, to make up for the fact that they (a) haven’t enough plot to fill the run time and (b) know that what they have got is entirely stupid. Hanging a lampshade on the stupidity of your film, though, doesn’t stop it being stupid. Thank you for watching it so that I don’t have to.

    • Michael A. Novelli

      Just call me Scrubbing Bubbles…

  • Mr. Mendo and The Omega – great review. Have to add that I’m disappointed in a way that this is how the film really plays out. From the early previews it looked like it was going to be a full on ‘Duel’ type of film from the perspective of the Tire…

    all hail our Firestone overlords!

  • TheOmegaGeek

    Is it ironic that the day after this went up, I had to get two new front tires from Firestone?

    • Michael A. Novelli

      Irony, hell! You’re one of THEM!

      Nah…

  • Cbob

    Am I the only one who notices that most all of the “no reason” stuff listed by the cop/narrator actually do have reasons, and fairly obvious ones at that?

    I mean, I haven’t seen the movie, but from the stuff in the review, it seems like that’s supposed to be a major part of the director’s meta commentary shtick. Not that there isn’t a certain degree of validity to the basic idea of some things being better off without having a reason (especially in horror), but it seems like the director doesn’t really understand his own point or how it actually applies.

    A director who honestly can’t grasp why the characters in Texas Chainsaw Massacre are never shown using the bathroom, or even who thinks the reasons are in any way obtuse or counter intuitive, seems a bit like a cook who can’t tell the difference between water and salt.

    • Michael A. Novelli

      Trust me, we left a lot of it out. That list went on for a while…

  • guest

    After looking at the comments, I just had to search for the full opening monologue on Youtube – honestly, making fun of this must have been like shooting fish in a barrel.

    ‘In the Steven Spielberg movie ET, why is the alien brown?’
    ‘In Love Story, why do the two characters fall madly in love with each other?’
    ‘In Oliver Stone’s JFK, why is the president suddenly assassinated by some stranger?’
    ‘Why do some people love sausages and some people hate sausages?’

    Apparently, the answer to all these questions is ‘no reason’. I think it says a lot that the line about Texas Chainsaw Massacre now sounds quite sensible.

    ‘I could go on for hours with more examples’ – Please don’t…

    ‘You probably never gave it a thought!’ – Umm, I think that more than one person has thought, ‘Why would a random stranger kill JFK?’ Even the writers of Red Dwarf gave some thought to that issue.

    This has to be the craziest movie speech since Rock: It’s Your Decision.

  • Voyager 6

    Can you imagine the pitch meeting for this film? “So, like a rubber tyre…”
    “Is there any other kind?”
    “Well, no…anyway, this tyre is alive….”
    “Riiiiight. And, er, what happens in the film?”
    “We hadn’t got that far. But we think the idea is solid.”
    “No it isn’t. It’s stupid. No-one would pay to watch that.”
    “Eat these mushrooms…”
    (nomnomom; 30 minutes later)
    “This idea is brilliant! I’ll write you a cheque now.”
    (writes away)
    “Er…you’re signing your own hand there.”
    “Am I? Or is that just what the electric donkey weasels in the carpet want you to think?”

    And so on, in the same EXTREMELY hilarious vein. (Note for US readers: That’s irony)

  • Muh!

    Wait a minute, it’s like the makes of a movie about a killer tire didn’t take the concept of a killer tire movie very seriously! That’s just CRAZY!

    • Michael A. Novelli

      It’s not like Killer Klowns, where the makers knew it was a dumb idea but ran with it anyway. Here, it’s like they realized it was stupid but said, “Fuck it, who cares?”

      There’s a difference…

      • Matthew K.

        To me it’s more like they had to club people over the head and make sure they totally understand “NO WE TOTALLY GET THIS IS STUPID, WE’RE NOT BAD FILM MAKERS, WE’RE JUST MAKING A BAD FILM. THERE’S A DIFFERENCE.”

  • Strelnikov

    The “meta” element reminds me of Soderberg’s “Schizopolis”, but otherwise it seems to be suffering from a terminal case of the cutes.

    • Michael A. Novelli

      To be honest, the meta actually makes one pine for the subtlety of Ferris Bueller after a while…

  • I thought this movie wasted so much potential. Imagine if they got rid of the annoying Greek Chorus and the sheriff’s pretentious monologue, it would have been pretty cool, something along the line of a Charlie Kaufman film.

    Also, love the first sentence of the second paragraph.

  • Antaeus Feldspar

    I can’t figure out whether there was supposed to be a point in the declaration about seeing none of the characters in TCSM go to the bathroom being *wrong.* It happens within the first ten minutes! They stop the van and the wheelchair-bound brother Franklin wheels down the ramp to the side of the road and starts using a porta-John!

  • Matthew K.

    I was mainly disappointed by this movie because it was because it was originally advertised as a mindless “sure, why not, a tyre kills people” movie. All the sad attempts at metahumour just told me that the people behind this movie movie:

    a) didn’t have enough actual content so they had to flesh it out with garbage
    b) think so highly of themselves that there’s just no way typical audiences would ‘get’ it, so they had to repeatedly labour every little thing.

    I mean I have a pretty low opinion of the average moviegoer and the way some great movies get butchered by endings that are redone because the tested poorly, but this takes it to a whole other level.

  • Somedouche

    I fail to understand how you went into this thinking that it would be a “killer tire horror movie” and continued to maintain that view through the whole thing. It was bizarre and meta, and a lot of the things you complained about were just elements of that kind of thing. At no point did you say anything about it being bad meta or bad bizarre, which to some extent it was.

    • Michael A. Novelli

      What can I say? I’m an optimist…

  • Mokume

    My choice for the tire song would have been “Hear the Engines Roar Now” from Pod People.
    This definitely sounds like an odd film, but I guess that’s just how this director, um, rolls.

  • You mean that WASN’T Todd in the shadows?

    • MichaelANovelli

      Afraid not…

  • MichaelANovelli

    Man, I can’t believe how skinny I was, back then…

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