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ABC's Very Special Dirty Dancing Remake
May 30, 2017
Road House (1989) (part 15 of 15)
Dalton hears a door open and crouches down. It’s Wesley himself, who calls out to Dalton and turns on a light so we can all enjoy the full splendor of his trophy room. Which contains a stuffed giraffe. The guy is hunting giraffes. Good god. How tough is it to hunt a giraffe? And judging by its height, it’s a baby giraffe at that. Man, the absurdities are piling on fast and thick, and then Wesley just goes and makes my head explode with this:
Wesley: I see you found my trophy room, Dalton. The only thing missing… is your ass.
Wow. Give me a moment here. Sometimes, a line comes along so deliriously awful that I can’t believe I really heard it. Did he really just say he wants to put Dalton’s ass in his trophy room?
And now I’m having sick, demented thoughts, of Patrick Swayze’s flat ass being stuffed and mounted on Wesley’s wall. Oh, that’s a horrible thought. And yet, I think Carrie-Ann would come by to visit Wesley each and every day. In a hypothetical world where Wesley isn’t about to get his comeuppance in the next ten minutes, of course.
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