Our Predictions for Every New ABC Show This Fall!
It’s Day 2 of prediction week at HNTP. Today, we tackle ABC.
The alphabet has five new shows scheduled this fall, although every single one of them will remind you strongly of something you’ve seen before.
The Muppets (9/22)
The Muppets return to TV with a The Office-style mockumentary behind the scenes of their legendary variety show.
Julie: Imagine if all your childhood stuffed animals came to life and put on a play together every week, one that basically involved them making sex jokes and winking ironically at an unseen camera about their “squeaky clean” past as your toys. A little disturbing, sure . . . but, other than that, what’s not to like? HIT
Marion: Hard to believe anything with The Muppets would be a miss, but this sounds like a sketch idea, not a series. There’s a sweet spot that shows like Rocky & Bullwinkle, The Simpsons, SpongeBob, etc., land in, where both adults and kids get something. This isn’t there. Kids won’t like it, and the only adults who do are probably closet furries—not that there’s anything wrong with that. MISS
Rick: This is an extremely clever update that should become a monster family hit. HIT
Susan: Their last foray into television, Muppets Tonight, only lasted two seasons, and there are valid concerns about how the traditionally G-rated Muppets will be able to keep up with ABC’s other comedies that can regularly drop swear words without fear of drawing the ire of parents and ruining childhoods. However, there’s already buzz over Kermit and Miss Piggy’s separation and Kermit’s new girlfriend, Denise, who is a little too sexy for an anthropomorphic pig in my opinion. Seriously, look at the way she sucks on a pen:
The Muppets have a strong legacy behind them and new characters that promise to keep people interested–even the ones who are too young to remember “Rainbow Connection.” HIT.
Blood & Oil (9/27)
North Dakota experiences an oil boom, with all the sexy intrigue and evil business shenanigans that go with it.
Julie: I’m confused . . . didn’t they already cancel the Dallas revival series? MISS
Marion: Dallas in North Dakota, more violence, less big hair. These saga shows look outdated no matter the spin. MISS
Rick: Another forgettable attempt to revive the 1980s glory days of the primetime soap. MISS
Susan: Look, network executives, I get it: Chace Crawford has a pretty face. But all the manly stubble and sex scenes can’t hide that Chace Crawford doesn’t really have the charisma to lead a show, especially when he’s pitted against powerhouse Don Johnson. MISS
A blatant ripoff of How to Get Away with Murder, except instead of wondering which law student committed the murder in the flash-forwards, we get to guess which FBI recruit committed the terrorist attacks in the flash-forwards.
Julie: Sure, one of them is an evil terrorist sociopath. But they are all so sexy, witty, stylishly dressed, and come with such endearingly sympathetic backstories. How can we let a little thing like mass murder get in the way of our shipping wars on IMDB? HIT (though I’m hating myself a little for wanting to check it out)
Marion: This is NOT Shondaland, but they’re going for the Shonda look and feel with both a diverse cast of beautiful people AND a super-ridiculous, highly unlikely storyline. I guess fourteen years was long enough to wait for 9/11 kitsch. HIT
Rick: They picked the right show to rip off, and the switch to terrorism is a strong angle. HIT
Susan: Hey, they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, right? Ripoff or no, I’m excited for it. I loved Pryanka Chopra in Bollywood’s Fashion so I’m pretty excited that she’s finally getting a breakthrough in America. I am intrigued by the “whodunit” mystery, although I hope that the show isn’t going to pin the crime on the brown members of the diverse ensemble cast. As long as we’re not over-saturated with the same flashbacks over and over again, I’m going to proclaim this a HIT
Dr. Ken (10/2)
What if House was a sitcom with that funny little asshole guy from Community and The Hangover?
Julie: I feel like this show would have been a huge hit back in the ‘90s, when sitcoms starring relatively well known comedians surrounded by a bunch of unknown, unfunny people were all the rage. But in 2015? MISS
Marion: True fact. Ken Jeong really was a physician before he became famous for just being annoying. His mom must be so disappointed. MISS
Rick: The premise isn’t bad, but the execution is, even for a Friday night sitcom. MISS
Susan: I have yet to let out even so much as chuckle when I watch the promos and trailers, which are nothing but a retread of bumbling sitcom dad jokes about not wanting his daughter to date and how weird his son is. ABC remains a long way from its TGIF glory days. MISS
Wicked City (10/27)
A True Detective wannabe, this crime anthology spends its first season in 1980s L.A. searching for a serial killer.
Julie: For those of you who always secretly felt like Chuck Bass from Gossip Girl was a closet sociopath (he did try to sell his girlfriend for a hotel, after all), ABC has finally gone and proved you right. Though I kind of think the dark subject matter of this one would play better on a pay cable channel than one owned by Mickey Mouse, I like its “rad” ‘80s style. HIT!
Marion: The trailer includes some unpleasantness, and it looks like we’ll be spending a lot of time with the serial killer, who’s no Dexter or Hannibal. That could be a problem. Plus, hasn’t the ‘80s been done enough with The Americans, Narcos and Deutschland 83? MISS
Rick: Like most network attempts to emulate trendy cable fare, it’ll ramp up the style to an eye-rolling degree while completely failing capture the substance. MISS
Susan: ABC nabbed another Gossip Girl alum for a lead role, but unlike Chace Crawford, Ed Westwick has the ability to command the screen. He may be falling into typecasting, but you can’t deny that he’s the perfect fit for serial killer Kent Grainger. I’m a sucker for period settings, and it looks like this show is paying attention to what the actual fashions of the 1980s were instead of dressing their cast in mismatched neon clothing *cough cough* The Carrie Diaries *cough cough*. For me, that’s an indication that the writers and producers aren’t interested in phoning in a generic criminal procedure. HIT
What do you think about ABC’s fall additions? Let us know below!
Check out our NBC predictions here, and come back tomorrow for FOX.