Never Too Young to Die (1986) (part 7 of 10)

We cut to Ragnar sitting in front of an extremely low-tech “computer” display that’s supposedly showing the “Diablo Canyon System”. In actuality, it’s just a sheet of transparent plastic placed over a bright green wall, and the flow of liquids through the system is depicted by someone pushing colored plastic tubing through grooves in the wall. Here to explain the display is Riley (played by Robert Englund). For no reason whatsoever, Riley is dressed in a letterman’s sweater [!] and a bolo tie [!]. My honest impression is that this movie’s costume designer sniffed too much glue as kid.

Never Too Young to Die (1986) (part 7 of 10)

C is for “crap-o-rama”, and that’s good enough for me.

Riley’s babbling something about the “exhaust” coming out of Diablo Canyon when Minkie’s Partner runs in. Ragnar asks him for the disk (His precise words are “Gimme gimme gimme!”), but Minkie’s Partner admits that Lance “squared us real good” and he didn’t get the disk. Ragnar, showing obvious (and I mean obvious) disappointment, starts waving his long sharp fingernail in Minkie’s Partner’s face. Minkie’s Partner starts to panic, screaming, “Not the spike! No spike!” (Wasn’t it called “The Finger” back when this movie started, which feels like about ten hours ago?) Ragnar starts to reassure him by caressing his chin. In a totally, wildly, unbelievably unexpected move, Ragnar jabs his fingernail into a poorly concealed latex appliance on the guy’s neck, and the wound starts spurting out huge amounts of blood. Minkie’s Partner dies instantly, and Ragnar yells at some other goons to “Garbage him!” (I mean, why just have him say “Get rid of him!” when you can make up your own incoherent slang?)

To read the rest of this article, support the Agony Booth on Patreon.
This post is available to our patrons who pledge $5 or more per month on Patreon. Click the “Unlock with Patreon” button below to sign up with Patreon or to log in with your existing Patreon account.
Already a qualifying Patreon member? Refresh to access this content.
Multi-Part Article: Never Too Young to Die (1986)

You may also like...