Nashville Recap: Is Scarlett A Drug Addict Yet? Probably!

Last week on Nashville, we learned that Avery and Juliette are maybe kind of in lurve, so we open this week with them in bed at Avery’s house. Deacon drops by, because we know that no one in Nashville ever calls — they just show up. Juliette hides under the covers and slithers onto the floor. Deacon wants Avery to record his set at the Bluebird as Deacon’s going to release the set as his solo debut.

We’re filming the new Rayna Jaymes video for that terrible slow ride sweet ride song, which remains terrible, but damn, Connie Britton looks good.

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Tandy drops by and all Rayna wants to chat about is Lamar coming home from prison and the big party that is about to transpire and how they’ve all got to be a family, dammit. Surprisingly, Tandy is not really into this plan!

Will is listening to demos that are crappy and are not Gunnar’s song, but Will has got to get some not-suck songs under his belt soon, as Edgehill is dropping his record the same day as Rayna’s to fuck with her. Gunnar has a new song that he wrote about Will and Brent that pretty much says Will is broken, so Will is kinda not feeling that one so much.

Zoey shows up looking fresh to death just to say she is leaving to run some mysterious errands but we’re not going to sort that out yet, apparently, because it’s time to cut to Deacon trying to get lawyer girlfriend Megan excited about his upcoming concert but Megan only wants to be grouchy that Lamar is getting out of jail free.

Oh hello, Scarlett. Are you a drug addict yet?

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You haven’t been home in days, sounds like, and you laid down three tracks and are filming a video and going to see Deacon and you have songs poring out of you and we give it two or three more episodes before she has to go to rehab.

Zoey is at a backup singer audition, which explains the fancy clothes, but she has showed up to an audition with no demo and no headshot. You will not be surprised to know that we have two enormous problems with the ridic level here. First, literally every person Zoey knows in Nashville is a star singer or songwriter, and could probably be a connect, and second, who the hell goes to an audition without audition-y things like that? Have you never watched a movie about Broadway, Zoey? Or a teevee show about dancers or singers or any sort of performer whatsoever?

Lamar is home! Hi Lamar! Time for Lamar to sound really weary, snark at Tandy for not visiting, and Tandy to race out the door. Even Rayna gets that something is hella weird, but Tandy is gone. The children are going to sing for Grandpa Lamar, because apparently we’re all just pretending that he didn’t just spend some undetermined time in prison for some fairly hefty offenses. Oh well, at least the kids sound good. They’re pretty much the only act that has survived the loss of T-Bone Burnett.

Avery is heading out to get ready for Deacon’s set, but Juliette is clinging to him like a barnacle and begging him not to go. Jesus Christ they are engaging in new lover baby talk and it is kind of the worst. Maybe we liked it better when Juliette was horrible.

We also forgot that Layla is basically living with Will, because best idea ever. Layla’s getting flown out to LA to debut her song, and Will is leaving to rehearse and Gunnar is leaving to write and Zoey is just standing around pouting because she also too wants to be a musician. Poor Zoey.

Teddy, why are you here at Rayna’s house? Oh, you are here to tell Rayna that Lamar is the one that knocked off Peggy when he was trying to knock off Teddy because Lamar thought Teddy was the star witness. Teddy says one million fast words about how he couldn’t have been the star witness because he didn’t know enough and therefore Tandy must be the star witness and and and and and.

Will and Gunnar are working on his song and here’s Brent, the only label liaison on Nashville. Brent needs Will to figure out some songs, but since Will won’t even look at Brent, the conversation doesn’t really go all that smoothly.

Juliette is still hiding out at Avery’s while he is away, watching movies and making weird childlike faces at the screen until she is busted by her assistant finally tracking her down.

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The assistant is the bearer of extremely bad tidings and tells Juliette that country radio is dropping her from their playlists. Please let this motivate Juliette to do something more interesting than mope around Avery’s apartment.

Time for a Tandy-Rayna chat so that Rayna can ask about the whole Teddy-Lamar-prison-murder shebang. Rayna doesn’t really understand why Tandy turned on Daddy, and oh right we forgot that Tandy did it because Lamar killed their mom. Rayna is just the slightest bit peeved that Tandy didn’t tell her that their dad was a murderer and that Tandy put dad in jail over it. Kind of a big thing to forget to mention. Tandy comes clean and gives Rayna the full report from her private investigator with all the deets on Daddy McMurder.

Will has dragged evil Jeff down to the studio to tell him he doesn’t like Brent, and Jeff asks if Brent has been inappropriate in any way. Will is off and running, telling Jeff he’s picking bad demos and makes him uncomfortable. Jeff tells him he will look after him personally and will take care of Brent, which we know full well means Brent is completely fired. Will, we know you’re working some shit out, but you’re a huge jerk.

Teddy is unburdening himself to Megan and good lord we’re kind of losing interest in what should be a really juicy corruption storyline because it has Teddy in it. Megan decides to hold his hand while they talk because that is a super professional lawyer thing to do

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…and that is, of course, right when Deacon walks in. Deacon, you’re overreacting, but Megan, stop literally holding your client’s hands. Deacon is maximum unhappy and asks Megan if she’s a victim junkie that can’t stop attaching herself to people — like Deacon, like Teddy — that have problems so she can feel better about herself. She tells him to get the hell out. Such a way you have with the ladies, Deacon.

Juliette is trying to show Avery her love by redecorating Avery’s apartment with extremely white lady-type furniture. This makes Avery sad and also too Avery is sad that Juliette won’t leave the house, but Juliette is not trying to hear that yet.

Jeff takes Brent to lunch to fire him and tell him that the talent is not comfortable around him and he has to protect his artists. Normally, we’d be pissed at Jeff because he is evil, but we’re saving all our anger for Will on this one.

Megan is cutting Teddy and his sad panda case loose but Teddy whines about how she is the only person he can talk to about it. Teddy, get a dog or a friend or something, you sad bastard.

Brent swings by the Will/Layla/Gunnar castle to tell Layla he won’t be accompanying her to LA since he has been fired and all. Will feigns some minimal sadness. Brent, bless his soul, totally calls Will out on it and tells Will he’s lost his biggest ally at Edgehill. Man, we wouldn’t cry to have Brent go all career-destroying evil on Will for a while. Will figures that this solves everything, until Gunnar reminds him that it isn’t just one dude, and Will tried to kiss him too. Will is not persuaded by this because Will is a jerk.

Scarlett is getting ready to film her part of the Rayna Jaymes music video and she is strung the fuck out.

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Oh, Scarlett. Nice career you had there.

Avery is leaving to record Deacon’s set at the Bluebird, while Juliette is never ever leaving Avery’s couch. Man, we cannot take much more of simpering weak scared Juliette. Go DO something, girl.

Rayna’s read through the whole daddy is a murderer file and goes out to straight up ask Lamar if he killed her mom. Lamar tells her that they had a fight, and mom left, so he chased her in his car. He sped up, she sped up, she crashed her car. According to Lamar — who we really have no reason to believe — he tried to help her, but when he got to the car mom was already dead and he panicked and left her there and lied about it forever. Is this true? Do we really care? We weren’t missing the Lamar plot line all that much, but maybe it will turn out all exciting and awesome. Maybe someone will murder someone else again. That usually spices things up.

Zoey is trying to explain her existential sadness to Gunnar, who explains to her cheerfully that she is a waitress at one of the best venues in Nashville and also too she dates him! She does not seem comforted by this. Weird.

Deacon is pouting and cutting the love songs from his set, but Avery points out that he has a lot riding on this night and he should get the hell over himself if he wants this to work.

Scarlett’s video part is filmed, and she looks great in that bright-eyed super high way. Everyone loves it, which means her bad drug behavior is going to be reinforced. Yay!

Thank God Juliette has left the house and came down to the Bluebird to watch Deacon’s show. Scarlett arrives there post-video filming and is still bright-eyed and weird. She almost pets Zoey’s hair because it is glamorous.

Megan and Deacon have a special reunion kiss moment before he goes on stage so we’ve neatly resolved that bit of sadness quickly and now he’s going to sing a song for Megan about angels. We want to hate, but he sounds pretty good.

Lamar is hoping that everyone can just get past the whole suspicion of murdering mom thing, but Rayna has moved on to wondering if Lamar hired someone to kill Teddy. Stop trying to murder people, Lamar, and people will stop asking you about murdering people. He doesn’t do a great job denying the Teddy thing, so Rayna tells him he’s dead to her.

Gunnar comes home to Will singing Gunnar’s song about being broken. It sounds beautiful, especially since you never hear Will sing anything except big glossy uptempo songs, but Will tells him he is the only one that will ever hear it. Will, when you are not being a jerk, you just make us sad.

Post Deacon concert, Juliette is finally coming out of her shell and is going to work with Avery on some stuff. Thank fucking god.

Zoey is back to the same audition lady she visited before. She still has no demo or headshot, but she has a random recording of singing at her church and a newfound confidence that she can sing! She can sing!

Lamar goes to confront Teddy, so Teddy thinks this is a great time to explain to Lamar that Tandy, not Teddy, was the person that put Lamar away. At just that very second, because this is a nighttime soap, Lamar suffers what appears to be a dramatic and probably fatal heart attack, gasping for help at Teddy looks on. So we’re ending this week on a light note, looks like? Tune in next week to see if the show knocked off Lamar.

TV Show: Nashville

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