Just Get Married, Already

Hey, guys, stop making up all those unfounded stories about the Kim and Kanye wedding, OK? It’s not cool, all right? You know the Kardashians don’t like people to talk about them. They have an aversion to press. It makes them break out in hives.

Kim is just pissed, and she’s here to set the record straight about her upcoming nuptials that won’t go down till the pre-nup is hashed out.

Ready?

Come again? You’re not going to film your wedding so you can make a bajillion dollars off of it?

OK, we kinda believe #4 because you know she will find a way to monetize that shit.

Carey Hart Assures Us Pink Is Not Pregnant

And he does so in a colorful fashion.

When motocross star and Pink’s husband Carey Hart caught wind of pregnancy rumors swirling around about his wife that were started by OK! magazine, he stepped right up to put them to rest.

The magazine was talking about how the couple was “hiding a big secret” and that people had witnessed Carey continuously rubbing Pink’s stomach.

The mag claimed Pink “was quick to move his hands away in case anyone saw.”

Carey’s response was quick and to the point:

We love these two badasses together.

The Bieber Strikes Back

Justin Bieber is tired of getting a verbal wedgie from Seth Rogen. Tired of the funny man tweeting that Justin’s a “piece of shit.” Tired of Seth telling everyone how he was a too-cool snot-nosed kid when Justin asked to meet him. Enough!

“And, Seth, check this out, man—it’s my new girlfriend. She’s an 18-year-old Spanish model.”

“Here I am throwing down some killer tricks on my board.”

Do you like me now?

Sideboob of the Day

Former Real Housewife of New York Kelly Bensimon showed up to support the 2014 Delete Blood Cancer Gala Honoring Evan Sohn and the Sohn Conference Foundation.