Sep 30, 2019
Morning Sideboob: Monster-in-Law Diana Ross Storms Ashlee Simpson’s Wedding Plans
Stomps on Vegan Cake Request
If you could magically choose from all the mother-in-laws in existence, Diana Ross probably wouldn’t land in your top 1,000, right? Talented, she is. Iconic, too. But she’s got a rep for knowing exactly what she wants and trampling anyone she has to on her way to get it. Mary Wilson and Florence Ballard, hello?
So just imagine if you fell head over heals in love (for the second time) and were getting ready to plan the wedding of your dreams (for the second time), and your monster-in-law is about to be Ms. (Don’t Look Me in the Eyes) Ross? Rough going, yeah? You bet. That’s what life looks like right now for Ashlee Simpson, who is engaged to Dirty Diana’s son, Evan.
Sources told the National Enquirer:
She’s driving Ashlee batty with her controlling ways and wacky demands. Diana also wants to stand by Evan’s side during the ceremony—and she’s insisting on singing during the nuptials and at the reception.
Diana was all: This is how it’s going to happen, young lady. I know you want a vegan wedding cake, but you can forget about that. I will be singing a 30-minute set at the reception. I’ll be wearing a bazillion-dollar dress that will take the attention away from you on your special day and shift it to me. Oh, and don’t think about getting cutesy and calling me Mom or Diana after the nuptials…it’s Miss Ross, you lip-syncing toad.
We foresee a screening of The Wiz worked into the festivities somehow.
Selena Gomez Exhibits Erratic Behavior
First, she’s dating Justin Bieber. Then she’s in rehab trying to quit him and a reported addiction to booze. Then she’s back visiting him in the studio to record a duet.
Selena appeared to be a happy camper hanging out at Coachella with her BFFs Kendall and Kylie Jenner. She even posted a photo of the three of them on her Instagram. Then last week she not only unfollowed the two-headed Jenner monster on Instagram (the worst kind of betrayal) but she unfollowed everybody and posted some cryptic, oh-woe-is-me stuff like this:
Rumor has it that Selena had some sort of breakdown at the music fest and accused Justin of hitting on other girls. We’re not sure if the Jenners were included in that, but now Selena is reportedly telling everyone that they are both bad influences who abuse drugs and alcohol.
But the sisters are throwing the bad influence hot potato right back at Selena, saying she’s the one who’s done time in rehab.
Selena needs to get herself back in touch with former bestie Taylor Swift so she can spend her weekends doing macramé and going antique shopping.
Chris Martin Takes the Blame for Uncoupling
Everyone has been speculating about what caused the end of Chris’ 10-year marriage to Gwyneth Paltrow. Was in infidelity? Her extreme dietary restrictions? Disagreements about how to raise their two children? Her being her?
It might be a combo of all those put together, but Chris is stepping up and saying he was not without fault. During an interview with BBC Radio 1, the notoriously private singer admitted:
About two years ago I was a mess, really, because I can’t enjoy the things that we are good at and I can’t enjoy the great things around me because I’m burdened by this. I’ve got to not blame anyone else and make some changes. I wouldn’t use the word breakdown—this was more a realization about trying to grow up, basically. If you can’t open yourself up, you can’t appreciate the wonder inside. So you can be with someone very wonderful, but because of your own issues you cannot let that be celebrated in the right way. If you don’t let love really in, then you can’t really give it back. You’ve got to open yourself up to love and if you really do, of course, it will be painful at some times, but then it will be great at some point.
We still think it’s all her fault.
Sideboob of the Day
Sofia Milos from “CSI: Miami” showed her support at the 3rd Annual BritWeek Christopher Guy Design Icon Award.
[Chris Martin and Sofia Milos photos by PR Photos]