May 1, 2020
Make Sure We Feel Safe This Christmas By Buying Us This Gunknife Knifegun
We get pretty concerned about personal safety around Christmas. So many roving bands of people wishing you good cheer or caroling or other Christmas behavior that brings them on to our property. It’s tough to know who is naughty and who is nice. Because of that, this year we’re asking for this knifegun gunknife.
It’s a handy knife that looks just like a gun! It’s like getting two weapons for the price of one! We can brandish it like it is a gun:
…which will be useful for scaring people off or getting ourselves shot by the police because they think our hyper-realistic gunknife knifegun is actually a gun.
If we’re not feeling all fake-shooty, we can get all realistic stabby:
Also, check out this ringing Amazon endorsement:
We’re sold! You buy!
[There are many less stabby things we’d like and they are all on our Christmas list.]