I Just Don’t Get Why Everyone Is Mad At The Google Bus
Sometimes I am a very bad liberal. Trigger warnings and waaahing about #rapeculture make me want to yell at all the baby feminists. I am not good at Intersectionalism. Don’t care about drones. And now I honest to God don’t know why we’re supposed to be mad about the Google Bus.
I get it like “gentrification is : (” and “the rent is too damn high” and I totally get it that tech bros and glassholes are making your lovely hippie city of San Francisco grotesque. (Hint to SF: you got pretty yuppie all the way back in the ’80s, and Apple or Snapchat or whatever had fuck-all to do with it.) But complaining about the buses? Blocking the buses? Doing funsy clown-dressed protests about the buses, even if you are as wacky and funny as former Bogota mayor Antanas Mockus (dudes, EVERYONE watch Cities on Speed, like, NOW) and dress as clowns or mimes or mimeclowns?
Here, have some Mockus, because awesome.
EARTH TO BRENT, buses are an environmental positive. They are good for your city. They are keeping your city from having more smog and more traffic and more adverse health effects from the stress of shitty soul-sucking commutes and more surface-level ozone and FEWER OF THESE FUCKERS CUTTING YOU OFF, because you know if they were driving their Lexii or their Teslas or whatever to work, THEY WOULD TOTALLY CUT YOU OFF.
Anyway, Valleywag’s got the statement from the protestors about whyyyyyyy, and it is full of stuff about evictions being up and how much in fines the Google buses would have to pay in fines to use the bus stops if they didn’t have a “backroom deal” with the SF transit authority, which, I would like to point out two things that will further make me an Enemy of the People: if they have a deal with the transit authority, which controls the bus stops, they are probably not acting in a manner that is “illegal,” and YOU get a fine when you stop in a bus stop, because YOU ARE NOT ACTUALLY DOING MASS TRANSIT. You are driving one or two people in a car. MASS TRANSIT IS GOOD, EVEN IF IT IS PRIVATE.
For the earth and other living things.