Jon Stewart & Kristen Schaal Take ‘Princeton Mom’ Susan Patton’s Advice, Find Men In College

March is Women’s History Month, so Jon Stewart celebrates (and tapes an episode in advance without referencing today’s news) with this special feature on women’s equality, and why there’s too much of it, as articulated by Susan Patton, the lady who advised college women to snare a man while they’re still dewy-eyed, fresh, and adorable. And who better to give a Princeton Mom story the in-depth analysis it so richly deserves than the dewy, adorable Kristen Schaal? She knows exactly how seriously to take advice like “Girls who know that they are on their last pint of nubile fuel should go into overdrive to find a husband and start a family.”

Yes, “nubile fuel,” which it turns out is in such short supply after gals hit 30 that it can only be accessed by fracking.

Watch the clips. You will larff.

And because the Daily Show insists on splitting its first act into two videos (probably because the metrics showed they get more viral clicketies or some such), here’s the rest, with Schaal, who we just have to add we are in love with (and whose voice work as Mabel in Gravity Falls is the best reason to not completely block the Disney Channel from your cable channel guide.)

As she says, men are scum, so hurry and marry one before they’re all gone.

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