Jane the Virgin RECAP: Baby Daddies R Us (S1:E5)

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Previously on Jane the Virgin:

  • Jane is pregnant with Rafael’s baby and finally got over her crush on him
  • However, he now has a crush on her!
  • Which is bummer for him because Jane and Michael are about to get married in a week
  • Michael covered up Petra’s apparent involvement in Zazo’s murder and the police are now looking into other suspects
  • But Petra is hiding a shady Czech past of her own
  • Lachlan, Rafael’s rival and Petra’s former fiancé, is now working at the hotel
  • Rafael figured out Petra cheated on him and announced that he wants a divorce
  • Luisa skipped town and Rose is trying to find her in time for the court hearing
  • Jane finally met her birth father, Rogelio, and she is pissed Xiomara kept him from her for so long

Get it? Got it? No? Too bad, we’re diving headfirst into telenovela land.

The Narrator explains that Jane and her mother were very close growing up with a typical mother-daughter relationship. “With the role of the mother played by Jane,” he adds.

Jane was the one who reminded her mother of her job interviews and talked her out of wearing super slutty leopard pumps on dates. “Don’t drink too much, don’t kiss too much, and call if you’re going to be late!” Jane would say as her mother went out the door.

“I want you home at reasonable hour or you’re grounded, old lady!”

“I want you home at reasonable hour or you’re grounded, old lady!”

Jane had to be the worrier and caretaker of the family, mostly since Alba did not know how to use the computer. Thus, Jane always wondered what it would be like to have a father to take care of her.

Now, in the present, Jane is upset that Xiomara never told her that Rogelio, the telenovela superstar, was her birthfather. She moves out of Casa Villanueva and into Michael’s apartment. He encourages her to make up with Xiomara before the wedding before she regrets it.

Meanwhile, Rogelio orders his lackeys to prepare an outfit for him. He informs everyone that Jane is coming to visit the set. “I must prepare to step into the role of father,” he announces dramatically.

At his apartment, Michael is clearing up space for Jane and her luggage. There is a knock on the door, and when he answers it, he sees his brother Billy, whom, according to the Narrator, Michael “frigging hates.” Billy asks for two thousand dollars and offers to continue to stay away from Jane if Michael coughs up the cash.

Funnily enough, Rafael is also trying to bribe Petra to stay away from him. He offers her cash to move out of the apartment so he doesn’t have to look at her for the rest of the divorce proceedings. Petra pleads for Rafael to think about Jane and the baby. Unfortunately for her, Rafael is thinking about Jane—in a sexy, dirty kind of way these days.

“Man, I am so glad you can’t read my mind because you’d be so pissed.”

“Man, I am so glad you can’t read my mind because you’d be so pissed.”

Magda, Petra’s wheelchair-bound mother, interrupts their argument so Rafael leaves it to be continued.

At work, Jane asks her friend Lina to cover her shift so Jane can go to lunch with Rogelio. They ignore the lewd comments from their disgusting co-worker, the appropriately named Disgusting Tom. Lina receives a text and meets her boyfriend, who turns out to be Billy!

This is a really random pairing, but it turns out they met at Jane’s engagement party and have been dating since then. Billy tells Lina that he wants to go public with their relationship. “Let’s change our Facebook status to ‘In a relationship!’” he says. “Oh, and let’s tell my brother that I’m seeing his fiancée’s best friend.”

“I’m sure he’ll be super pleased!” replies Lina. Then they kiss.

Rafael finds Jane at work and informs her that Petra cheated on him with Zazo and they are getting a divorce. Wow, I can’t believe the conflict ball we’ve been holding onto for the last five episodes has finally dropped. It’s okay because Jane picks up another one when she tells Rafael that she is uncomfortable with giving the baby to a single parent. “I just have this picture in my head of this thing I didn’t have: a two-parent, happy, stable home,” she says disappointedly. “And now you’re telling me that’s not going to happen.”

Jane, plenty of kids have come from single-parent homes and they’ve turned out alright. Haven’t you ever seen About a Boy?

Rafael quickly backpedals and claims that he and Petra are considering therapy in an attempt to change Jane’s mind. He begs Jane not to make any final decisions. She frets to Michael about their options and is still reeling that Petra cheated with Zazo. Michael pretends to be shocked and pretends that he had no involvement in covering up Petra’s affair.

“What?! That is brand new information! Pay no attention to how I am refusing to make eye contact.”

“What?! That is brand new information! Pay no attention to how I am refusing to make eye contact.”

Jane visits Rogelio on the set of his telenovela. With the help of his crew, he plans a dramatic entrance and hugs her, to the applause of onlookers. Jane is uncomfortable. I would be too.

At the hotel, Michael and his partner asks Rafael for employee records on the night of the murder. They believe their murder suspect is an employee who might also have a connection to the drug kingpin Sin Rostro, whom Michael has been trying to track. Rafael is annoyed but gives them the records. He tries to ask why Michael changed his mind about keeping the baby, but Michael just makes snide remarks about Rafael’s failing marriage.

That was a low blow, Michael.

At Casa Villanueva, Xiomara frets that Jane and Rogelio are setting voodoo dolls of her on fire and talking about what a horrible person she is.

JANE THE VIRGIN RECAP: Baby Daddies R Us (S1:E5)

Father-daughter bonding time.

In reality, Jane and Rogelio are struggling to make awkward conversation. To Jane’s dismay, Rogelio is very shallow and is not what she was hoping for at all. Michael suggests that Jane try having dinner with Rogelio in a more private setting. Jane sees his case files in the car and notices Disgusting Tom isn’t on the list of employees working the night of the murder when he was definitely there. Michael agrees that it might be a clue but reminds Jane that they are in a telenovela so she should lay off the criminal investigations.

Meanwhile, Magda is scolding Petra for letting Rafael get away. “You said you’d always take care of me,” she reminds her. Then she fusses over Petra’s looks to help her seduce Rafael again.

Jane bumps into Xiomara when she returns to Casa Villanueva to get a recipe for her dinner with Rogelio. Xiomara asks how their meeting went, and Jane blames her for the awkwardness. “What you took away from me is not okay,” snaps Jane. “I don’t know how you could have done it.” Xiomara claims that it was easier to pretend Rogelio didn’t exist since he wasn’t around. She asks Jane to forgive her, but Jane is still upset.

At the hotel, Michael confronts Rafael and demands the full list of employees for their investigation. Without actually saying it, Michael and Rafael express their dislike for each other.

His mouth says, “Everything’s fine,” but his eyes say, “I HATE YOUR STUPID FACE!”

His mouth says, “Everything’s fine,” but his eyes say, “I HATE YOUR STUPID FACE!”

At work, Lina admits that she has been seeing Billy to Jane. Jane worries that Billy is using Lina to make Michael angry, but Lina is too in love to care. “Just ask Michael to give him a chance,” she pleads. “We changed our Facebook status and everything. I don’t want to go back to ‘It’s complicated.’”

Petra attempts to make up with Rafael by showing him the hat she crocheted three years ago for the first time they attempted to have a baby. She reminds him that they used to be so happy. “We have the best reason of all to stay together,” she tells him. “The new baby.” She kisses him and for her sake, I hope Rafael isn’t picturing Jane again.

Michael is displeased that Lina is dating Billy and admits to Jane that when he and Billy were younger, they used to steal cars together. They eventually got caught, and Billy took the blame for Michael. Ironically, the experience caused Michael to turn his life around while Billy fully embraced the criminal life. “You don’t have to be proud with me, Michael,” Jane tells him. “Just honest.”

Michael sweats and tugs his collar nervously, and Jane pretends not to notice.

Rogelio visits Casa Villanueva to lament how awful his meeting with Jane went to Xiomara. She advises him on Jane’s likes and dislikes. Apparently, Jane likes movies and shopping at Target. I wonder if that is product placement. I don’t watch the show live, so can anyone confirm if Target commercials air during Jane the Virgin? It’s just such a random character trait.

Anyway, Rogelio begs Xiomara to come to dinner and act as a buffer, but Xiomara knows she won’t be welcome. Luckily, Rogelio has nothing to be nervous about. Dinner is a lot less awkward, but then he ruins it when he asks Jane to forgive Xiomara. Jane becomes upset and abruptly decides that it’s not worth it to try to build a relationship with Rogelio if he’s going to do rational things like remind her that her single mother had good reasons for never mentioning Rogelio. She excuses herself and tells Rogelio she doesn’t want to see him anymore.

Tough break, Dad.

Tough break, Dad.

The next day, Rafael tells Petra that he is tired of fighting. Petra is relieved, thinking that she saved their marriage, but Rafael serves her divorce papers anyway. Desperate, she reminds him that Jane won’t let him have custody of the baby if he is a single father, but Rafael doesn’t care. “I don’t love you anymore,” he tells her. He doesn’t tell her that he is in love with the woman who is accidentally artificially inseminated with his sperm.

Rogelio meets Jane at the hotel and admits that he was trying too hard to impress her. She agrees to try to build a relationship again, and he gives her a badly photoshopped picture as a present.

Like really badly photoshopped.

Like really badly photoshopped.

Jane and Michael meet with Rafael, and she informs him that she is willing to share custody with him. Rafael is unhappy and vows to fight for more time with his child. Jane offers to work out custody arrangements as needed. When they leave Rafael’s office, Michael receives a text notifying him that Disgusting Tom has gone AWOL from the hotel. He leaves to investigate.

At the apartment, Jane is making dinner for Michael and accidentally discovers the file containing evidence of Petra and Zazo’s affair. Meanwhile, Rose and Rafael stumble upon Disgusting Tom, who has been stabbed to death. His last words are “Sin Rostro,” confirming that he and Zazo were connected to the drug kingpin. Michael and his police partner explain to Rose and Rafael who Sin Rostro is and how he is connected to Zazo and Disgusting Tom. They order the two not to tell anyone about Sin Rostro lest they compromise the investigation.

When Michael returns from work, Jane is angry that Michael almost let her give up the baby to a couple who were clearly unstable. She makes up with her mother and moves back home.

Meanwhile, Petra allows her mother to beat her up, and they go to the police to accuse Rafael of domestic violence.

So let’s review:

  • Jane is pregnant with Rafael’s baby and he has a crush on her
  • Rafael is going to divorce Petra, but she’s not going to let him go without a fight. So she’s pretending that he beat her up in a fight? I’m actually not clear on her motivations here.
  • Michael is investigating the drug kingpin Sin Rostro
  • Michael’s bad boy brother Billy is back in town, and he’s dating Jane’s friend Lina
  • Jane tried to build a relationship with Rogelio, but it was a little awkward. They’re working on it.
  • Jane made up with her mother but only because she is mad at Michael for lying about Petra’s affair

Susan Velazquez

Susan is a recent college grad and writer who enjoys all things from the 1980s, snarking on dumb television, and reveling in celebrity gossip. Oh, and she has serious interests like reading historical fiction, getting involved in social issues, and consuming French fries.

TV Show: Jane the Virgin

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