May 24, 2018
Jane the Virgin: 28 Days Later...And Later...And Later...
Previously on Jane the Virgin:
- Jane finally chose Michael, but when his violent temper hurt Baby Mateo, she called it quits–for good
- Or did she? I know how this trope plays out, telenovelas!
- Nadine is back! And she is holding Michael at gunpoint! So much for being partners…
- Petra is now (un)happily married to Milos who is trying to sell grenades on the side.
Get it? Got it? No? Too bad. We’re diving headfirst into telenovela land.
Jane is depressed about dumping Michael, and Michael is also in a bad mood. Nadine has forced him to drive her to Mexico and isn’t giving any information about where they are going. He asks for her help to find and catch Sin Rostro–Michael thinks if he can be a hero again, everything in his life will be alright again.
Speaking of false heroes, Rogelio is angry that his ex-wife Luciana stole his thunder and rehired the telenovela crew behind his back for her new show, which she is co-starring in with his arch-nemesis Esteban. The Villanuevas don’t have time to get too involved in his drama when they’ve got their own life-and-death situations to focus on–literally. Jane and Rafael are negotiating their estate, and although the two can agree on who gets custody of Mateo when they die, the one thing Jane can’t agree on is letting Mateo have access to Rafael’s $40 million trust fund.
Jane’s focus on Mateo makes her distracted at her grad student orientation. Professor Jonathan Chavez gets annoyed when Jane takes a call from Mateo’s pediatrician in the middle of the meeting and kicks her out of class.
“I’m really sorry, but I have to take this. I’m in a telenovela and you never know what drama is going to pop up.”
To make up for her bad first impression, Jane spends the next month of grad school working hard. Unfortunately, she still gets a C- on her first paper. All of Jane’s hard work on grad school has caused her to neglect Mateo. Because she put him on his back too much while she studied, Mateo has developed a flat head, and now she and Rafael have to get him fitted for a special helmet. Thankfully, Rafael’s other unborn children are doing fine–that’s right, children. Petra is carrying girl twins! Petra is already overwhelmed since her new husband is focused on selling illegal weapons and her mother is still in prison.
Meanwhile, Rafael has realized that he is about to have three children and has not had sex in over a year–not even to make any of the said three children.
“Maybe if I get a spin-off, I can finally get laid.”
28 days later, there are new changes: Magda has been released from prison and Jane has chosen to go on a grad student writers’ retreat instead of staying home. Jane is upset that she is missing Mateo’s milestones while she is away and finally opens up to her fellow grad students. Telling the story about your accidental artificial insemination, complicated love triangle, and baby’s kidnapping always garners sympathy and Jane finally makes some friends! Rafael stops by the retreat to drop off Jane’s breast pump, and she gets to see Mateo in his new medical helmet for the first time. Acting like a family must have really turned Rafael on because he tries to kiss Jane.
Unfortunately, Jane rejects him. “I don’t want to complicate things,” she says.
“This would uncomplicate things,” Rafael points out. “You know how much easier it would be to explain our situation to other people?”
Jane admits she is still not over Michael, and Rafael realizes that if Jane isn’t going to move on, then he has to.
“Are you suuuuuure you don’t want to join Team JaFael?”
Jane has to confront her unresolved feelings for Rafael when one of the single moms from her Mommy and Me class asks for permission to date Rafael. Jane gives her the go ahead, although she still feels uncomfortable about it.
Speaking of awkward situations, Petra and Magda have successfully driven away Milos but only temporarily. He is not divorcing Petra and has sent a henchman to watch the women and make sure they don’t get rid of the grenades. Oh and while we’re on the subject of bombs: production on Rafael’s telenovela version of Mad Men has stalled while his ex-wife’s Luciana show is a success.
Oh, look it’s been another 28 days later…again.
So Rafael is still dating, Petra and Magda have gotten Milos in trouble for internet scamming and have dumped the grenades although Magda lost a hand doing so, and Jane is grouchy because she is sick and her life is falling apart. Grad school sucks, motherhood sucks, and yes, Rogelio’s new show still sucks.
Whoa, that’s a lot of stuff that happened in a month. I don’t mind a time skip now and then but seriously, are we going to be on fast forward for the rest of the season?
And what do you know? It’s yet ANOTHER 28 days later, and everything has been resolved–kinda of. Rafael broke up with his girlfriend because he’d still rather be with Jane and asks her on a date. It’s been like at least 4 sets of 28 days later so it’s been enough time for Jane to move on from Michael. She accepts his offer.
But trouble is on the horizon: Milos’s henchman returns to warn Magda that Milos is coming for her so she kills him. Also, Michael returns from his road trip and confronts his ex-partner, Susanna Barnett. And we have the new plot line of Jane’s grad school friend Wesley interviewing employees at the Marbella about Rafael and his family.
So let’s review:
- Jane and Rafael are finally going on a date! #TeamJaFael is back in the game!
- But Michael’s back in town…Does this mean there is an angle open for the love triangle?
- Magda murdered a Czech henchman and now she needs Petra’s help to cover the crime up!
- Jane’s new friend Wesley is probably not a friend after all since he’s writing a tell-all book about her life