Genius Startup Plan: Step 1 – Hire Lindsay Lohan, Step 2 – ???, Step 3 – Profit!

Genius Startup Plan: Step 1 - Hire Lindsay Lohan, Step 2 - ???, Step 3 - Profit!

Do you ever wish you were rich? Even if it was sort of washed-up post-rehab rich where somehow your name still carried enough cachet that people would pay you to do nonsense made up things like host a VIP party for their silly iPhone app? Enter Lindsay Lohan.

What does this Very Important App Just Sing It! do exactly? It’s the Instagram of singing! Crossed with karaoke! Multiplied by Words with Friends! Seasoned with Snapchat! Or something.

Serenade your crush, bust a rhyme, gamify your commute, sing out during Happy Hour – unleash your voice!
Sing and guess top songs from genres of all eras
Boost your songs with fun voice effects
Share on Facebook and Twitter

The more songs you guess and sing, the more glee you share.
As easy as 1, 2, 3:
1. Challenge a friend
2. Sing them a song
3. Guess the song they sing for you

Sounds like…wait that sounds TERRIBLE! So your friends, or worse still some rando that has a crush on you, can just invade your phone and sing you a song? with sound effects?? and then challenge you to figure out what the hell they just sang??? And then you sing back to them?? WHO WANTS THIS????

Lindsay Lohan, apparently, as she’s going to be rolling over to the VIP party, because that is now a thing we have for iPhone apps, and you can get your photo taken with her as she maybe advises you about technology, we guess?

Just Sing It! must be hurting if Lindsay is the biggest name they can bring in to fake-advise or VIP. Hell, Lenovo got Ashton Kutcher, because he needed a new thing to pretend to be good at besides photography:

That app that only lets you take selfies and only works if you’re a bro got Justin Bieber to invest or advise or something them.

In a development that does not bode well for the future of the Instagram of singing, Lohan seems to believe her duties are limited to the verrrrryyy occasional tweet about the thing. She probably gets paid actual money for this! And she doesn’t have to do anything! And she likely knows nothing about it! Think about that this afternoon while you’re using your silly “knowledge” for your “job.” Sucker.


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  • docterry6973

    I can’t think of one way I could profit by having Lindsay Lohan around. Well, OK, but I can’t think of a second way.