Intelligent Design Proponents Still So Mad At ‘Cosmos,’ Still So Happy They Can Be Mad At ‘Cosmos’

Intelligent Design Proponents Still So Mad At 'Cosmos,' Still So Happy They Can Be Mad At 'Cosmos'

Perhaps because they got so mercilessly mocked last week, this week the evolution-denying viewers of “Cosmos” decided to take a different route than the LEAVE JESUS ALONE road they’d previously traveled. Instead, this week, we get so many much words about intelligent design’s faux-science, perhaps in the hope that we will drown in them and then the complete nonsense they are won’t matter. They also tried to trot out some leftover butthurt from last week’s episode. Man, that is some long-acting butthurt.

This week’s sadmad first. We tried — we really did! — to read all the words in the intelligent design shill blog Evolution News review of Cosmos episode two. SPOILER ALERT: They are extra special sugar on top mad about this episode, because Tyson basically said “evolution is real, haterz” and dropped the mic. We even tried to diagram some sentences, because we are a full-service blog. Incompre-fucking-hensible. We did, however, get the gist of the thing, we think, which is that intelligent design IS TOO SCIENCE but also loves Jesus and they are way smarter than Neil Degrasse Tyson ipso facto QED. No matter how hard they try to fling graphs at you, at the end they inevitably circle the Jesus drain.

In this second episode of Cosmos, Neil deGrasse Tyson and his co-creators hoped to convince viewers that intelligent design is wrong, but discussing by simply the complexity of biology, they couldn’t help but expose people to the evidence for design in nature. When Cosmos Episode 2 showed brilliant animations of walking kinesin motors, and discussed the fact that DNA is a “molecular machine” that is “written in a language that all life can read,” it unwittingly showed that intelligent design is a viable explanation. After all, what is the sole known cause that produces languages and machines? That one singular cause is, of course, intelligence. Even when you try to disregard the evidence for design in nature, it nevertheless speaks for itself.

So, if you talk about biology at all, and the cool things biology can do, you are actually discussing intelligent design no matter what. Got it.

Honestly, the whole thing reads like this.


You only have to poke around the Evolution News site to realize that Cosmos is their holy grail, their cash cow. They can rally the faithful around this thing forever.

Here at Discovery Institute’s Center for Science & Culture we believe that the antidote to such faulty thinking is truth — truth about the inadequacy of the Darwinian explanation for the complexity and diversity of life, about the positive scientific evidence of design in cosmology and biology. There is an urgent need to educate young people to participate thoughtfully in the debate over what constitutes good science and good education. We need to raise up scientists, educators, journalists, and even movie and TV producers who can speak with sweet reason and authority about this vital issue not only in science but in our culture. That’s why your support of our Summer Seminar on Intelligent Design in the Natural Sciences is so important.

After all, who do you want to educate our society on the issue of evolution and intelligent design? Is it show business producers who are perpetuating the ideas of Sagan, Dawkins, and Tyson?

Your support of the Summer Seminar will allow us to summon a new generation of educators and leaders who have the desire, vision, and determination to break the hold that neo-Darwinism has on science, the media, and our culture as a whole.

Translation: please give us money because you don’t want fancy pants non-Jesus-loving Neil Degrasse Tyson and filth-mouthed Seth MacFarlane teaching your children, do you? NO YOU DO NOT.

Meanwhile, the Catholic Brigade is still stuck on last week’s episode, which discussed Giordano Bruno, who was a firm believer in the Sun being the center of the universe. Last week’s episode was rightly criticized for oversimplifying the inquisition and eventual execution of Bruno, as his execution was more likely tied to his denial of the divine cosmology rather than his scientific beliefs. But wait. That’s your BEST argument? That your religious nutjob side killed the guy for the RIGHT reasons?

In contrast to Cosmos’s narrative, Bruno was not executed for this cosmological theories. He was, in fact, executed for his heretical theological views—views on the divine nature of the Christian Messiah, the triune nature of the Godhead, and a host of other subjects on which Cosmos had no comment. Far from being the martyr for science that Cosmos attempted to cast Bruno as, it is far more likely Bruno was no martyr at all. For martyrdom necessitates that a person has died in defense of the truth about Christ, not opposing it.

You sure showed us! You totes had reason to burn that guy to death! He didn’t believe in your sky god! Excellent reasoning!

Breitbart waited a week to spit out a post that we thought by now they could have written in their sleep: that science is just the way to gain political control and keep the Christian man DOWN, man.

[I]t is not really science that many of these leftists respect and believe in. Rather, it is the convenient use of science to attack Christianity and to further their own political cause. For example, as Global Warming models slowly collapse, those who claim to be pro-science are looking more and more like religious freaks every day.

We were going to google how many times Breitbart and Company have written this exact same science screed, but we are not scientists and do not have to prove our assertions, so we’re just going to go with again and again and again and again and again times infinity, which is totally a real number.

Tune in next week when the butthurt will probably go to eleven.

[Evolution News/Theological Grafitti/Breitbart]

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  • Wilson P. Dizard

    That would be Erasmus of Rottergoddamnit, to give him his full moniker. And as for that stuff about “Erasmus laid the egg that Luther hatched,” you can just keep that to yourself, smart-aleck. And no more idle badinage about how Erasmus advised Henry VIII to take a mistress rather than plunge England into sectarian conflict, either.

    • Greg Comlish

      What the? Is this a meticulously preserved sample of 600-year-old Erasmustian Büttenhurt? Whose “idle badinage” are you referring to? What the hell are you talking about?

  • unhipcat

    haha… you bunch of stupids. they didn’t kill bruno because of science, they killed him because of you can take your so-called evolution and shove it up where my intelligent design doesn’t shine..

  • unhipcat

    can you post that link to all the peer-reviewed studies that prove peer-reviewed Global Warming models are slowly collapsing

    • vreejack

      Years from now the naysayers of relocated Houston will be loudly proclaiming the failures of climate theory.

  • Deleted

    This post was deleted.

    • WA Bishop

      The director of the institute is Phyllis Stein and the director of research is Kent C. Detrees.

  • It’s unfortunate that Cosmos isn’t going to do an episode on psychological projection because wow so much source material just from the show’s critics alone.

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  • $73376667

    The solution is clear: boycott Fox properties.

  • Boscoe

    So what we’ve learned today is that speaking “with sweet reason and authority” totally trumps all your Jeebus-hating facts and sciency-validations that we all know are made-up junk that only exists to buttress the hate-fueled anti-Jeebus conspiracy. Haterz.And now I’m going to go flagellate myself for typing “butt”.

  • smitallica

    Yes Jesus Freaks, the Darwinian explanation is so “inadequate” that it’s never been anything but confirmed and strengthened by over 150 years of almost continuous scientifically rigorous testing and re-testing.

  • vreejack

    “cdesign proponentsist”

  • Annie Towne

    Here’s what’s weird about this, for me: My father was an important scientist, a leader in his field, with several advanced degrees. He also, was a Republican who often voted Democrat; a believer in God but not in the literalness of the Bible; absolutely certain that evolution was true. Why? Because people are fucking COMPLEX, that’s why, and there are many who have spiritual lives that in no way invalidate what they know to be true scientifically. So what’s weird for me is the polarization of all of this. My dad had the highest IQ of anyone I ever knew in person and had no problem saying he didn’t know the answer to every question, that in fact, science did not yet have the answer to every question, and that we’d learn more as time went on. How did we get to this place where, to be Republican, one had to also be entirely ignorant of how the world works?

    • Rab Simpson

      You don’t have to be entirely ignorant of how the world works, but it helps.Ignorance is bliss… for the ignorant. For the rest of us their ignorance is an absolute nightmare.

  • kfreed

    I used to be appalled by the never ending Conservative Christian faux butthurt over evolution (science in general it now appears), but these days I can’t help but roll on the carpet laughing my guts out. Yes. I realize these people are now running entire states and at least half the US Congress, but I just can’t constrain myself anymore.

  • kfreed

    “Here at Discovery Institute’s Center for Science & Culture..”…brought to you by the tea partying Kochs, among other wealthy conservative wingnuts with more money than brains. Meet the “Libertarian Theocrats” (Google it):The Guardian: “Conspiracies against the public don’t get much uglier than this. As the Guardian revealed last week, two secretive organisations working for US billionaires have spent $118m to ensure that no action is taken to prevent manmade climate change. While inflicting untold suffering on the world’s people, their funders have used these opaque structures to ensure that their identities are never exposed…A small number of the funders have been exposed by researchers trawling through tax records. They include the billionaire Koch brothers (paying into the two groups through their Knowledge and Progress Fund) and the DeVos family (the billionaire owners of Amway). More significantly, we now know a little more about the recipients. Many describe themselves as free-market or conservative thinktanks.Among them are the American Enterprise Institute, American Legislative Exchange Council, Hudson Institute, Competitive Enterprise Institute, Reason Foundation, Heritage Foundation, Americans for Prosperity, Mont Pelerin Society and Discovery Institute. All pose as learned societies, earnestly trying to determine the best interests of the public. The exposure of this funding reinforces the claim by David Frum, formerly a fellow of the American Enterprise Institute, that such groups ‘increasingly function as public relations agencies.'”Read on if you don’t mind your day being ruined:, invironmentalism, like evolution, is a leftist conspiracy to undermine Christianity, don’tcha know: