Unlock with Patreon
Star Trek: Lower Decks “Moist Vessel”
Aug 28, 2020
Ghost (1990) (part 2 of 8)
The next day, we get an establishing shot of Wall Street, today’s Highly Visible Landmark, which clues us in that this story is taking place in New York City. Patrick and Carl emerge from the subway station onto the street. Patrick has slicked his hair into an odd sort of Arsenio-esque pompadour, while Carl is sprouting an unfortunate case of muffin head. Patrick is practicing basic phrases in Japanese, in preparation for a meeting with a potential client. Ah, the late ’80s (more or less), where it seemed the Japanese would rule the entire free market economy.
Still out on the street, Carl takes a moment to compliment Patrick’s suspenders. And we all know how men are about admiring each others’ suspenders, don’t we? As they enter their office building, they comment on a Testarossa parked on the street—For no deeper reason, apparently, than the filmmakers thought it would be cool to put a Testarossa in this movie.
They step into a crowded elevator. Patrick loudly asks Carl if his rash has gotten any better. Carl dramatically sighs that it’s spread. Patrick asks, “Genitals?” and tries desperately to stifle laughter as Carl sadly nods. The doctor’s prognosis isn’t good, Carl says, and wouldn’t you know, the rash is highly contagious. Carl feebly coughs as the others in the elevator grow uncomfortable and try to move away from him.
The two exit the elevator laughing. Ha! It was all a little joke, see? What scamps you two are! And not in any way raging assholes. It must be a gas to live on Planet Patrick. There, you don’t have to worry about how it’s 1990 and AIDS is in everyone’s living rooms and there’s fear and misinformation all over the place.
“So, Steven Seagal now has a line of colognes, too?”
To read the rest of this article, support the Agony Booth on Patreon.
Jessica Ritchey
Born in Western North Carolina, Juniper was discovered in a filthy shack in the lovely Blue Ridge Mountains, speaking a made up language to a tattered rag doll, her only companion. Her social skills have improved little in the intervening years. She is currently making flailing efforts at being a freelance writer. One of history's supreme procrastinators she plans on writing a book about it someday.
Latest Comments