Dec 24, 2019
Who Covered It Dumber? Obama Buys Pink Sweaters For The Girls
Let’s play a new game we just invented called “Who Covered It Dumber?” Which media source was the mostest stupid about a story? Today, we will pit the New York Post against Fox News in a battle to the derp. Today’s topic: Obama shopping at the Gap.
So Obama went to the Gap last week to highlight the company raising their starting wage to $9 per hour, which is a thing that normal people agree is a nice thing, and smart people agree is still not nearly enough to live on. The Post’s story actually does cover that important thing, but the people in the New York Post Cover Department decided that the REAL story here was Obama’s extreme girlyman behavior in touching a pink sweater.
Do you think he caught the gay from touching it, or would just having been near it be enough? Would manly men like weak-chinned Ted Cruz stick to bold masculine colors for touching, so they didn’t accidentally get any girly on them?
Of course Bamz was looking at — and buying — the sweaters for his girl children, who perhaps like pink just fine. We will take pains to point out, however, that even if Bamz was buying a goddamn truckload of pink sweaters for himself, that neither enhances nor diminishes his masculinity, because people can wear whatever color sweaters they like.
So, New York Post, your coverage was a Meh on a scale of one to Maximum Idiocy, but your cover gets a score of Critical Derp.
So Fox lady is very sure that Bamz’ press team fell down on the job here by showing him getting all girlified.
“I’m telling you, his PR department has to know that by holding up a pink sweater, he’s going to get guff for it,” Ashburn insisted.
“Guff?” WHO SAYS THAT? Also, his PR department is not made up of nitwits (we hope) who think that showing a man buying a perhaps lady-colored sweater for his GIRL CHILDREN is somehow a bad look.
Fox lady went on to complain that Obama only got Michelle some socks, but because this is Fox, they couldn’t even get that part of the story right.
[Gap clerk Susan] Panariello recommended a hoodie for the First Lady, but the president said she doesn’t like them.
He instead chose a slate-blue, medium athletic zip-up track jacket for Michelle, who has made no bones about her love for Gap’s styles[.]
That does not sound like a pair of socks! This wouldn’t be quite as odd a slip up, but the Fox talking head lady was critiquing the New York Post story itself, which means she was holding the thing in her dumb little hand and was supposed to have read it, but she couldn’t be arsed to actually pull that off, so socks it was.
Helpless hangdog Howie Kurtz tried petulantly and ineffectively to defend Obama but we do not really need or want Howie to defend anything, so no points for Fox there.
Fox, your score on a scale from one to Sweet Jesus The Dumb Is Killing Us is a solid Shut Up Already.
Now let’s tabulate the results:
Haha no one wins! Both are dumb in their own special way and also too because some of our brain cells committed suicide while having to watch Fox News do media analysis. Some of yours probably did too. Sorry about that.