Fantastic Four (2015), a recap (part 4 of 7)

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Previously: After a successful teleportation attempt involving a cartoon monkey, the best and brightest minds of the Baxter Institute (plus Ben Grimm) got drunk off a bottle of vanilla extract, and then decided on the spur of the moment to transport themselves to an alternate dimension.

The four guys climb inside the machine and the pods close up, and somewhere else in the facility, Sue gets a notification on her computer screen that the Quantum Gate has just been activated. So she immediately calls up her father, instead of just telling anyone else in the room full of people she’s currently in.

As a countdown commences, Reed mutters, “Don’t blow up, don’t blow up”, as a callback to him doing the same thing in the intro where he and Ben were kids. There’s a flash of light, and then they’re in the other dimension.

At first, they don’t think it actually worked, but then Reed sees a hazy brown mist through the window of his pod. They all open their pods and step out onto an alien world. They take in the rocky terrain with pools of green lava off in the distance, and Victor whispers to himself, “I made it!” The implication being that Victor in particular has some sort of deep psychic connection to this place, but this never really becomes important.

“I made it into a Boris Vallejo painting!”

Victor and Johnny wander around, while Reed and Ben get to work on planting that American flag. Johnny takes a photo with the landscape behind him, and quips that this is “definitely going on Instagram.” Why not post a vlog from the other dimension while you’re at it? Instead of “one small step for man”, the quote from this mission that’ll be remembered down through the ages could be “smash that like button, bro”.

When they plant the flag, it causes cracks in the ground revealing more glowing green lava. Victor says that all of this energy is “converging” in the distance, and thinks they should go check it out, and like a bunch of bozos the other three go along with this.

They get to the edge of a cliff, and Victor decides he’s going to rappel down, and he even brought climbing equipment with him. Reed and Ben head down with him while Johnny stays on top to be their anchor. They get to a big pool of green lava and Victor says he can “feel it” and “it’s alive”, and he thinks it’s actually responding to his presence. He then dips his hand in and sighs with pleasure, and the pool glows brightly. And then it explodes in his face.

At last, we know where Mountain Dew comes from.

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Multi-Part Article: Fantastic Four (2015): a recap

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  • Chris Mingus

    Big glowing puddle of an unidentified substance in another dimension? Go ahead and poke it with your hand, because you can apparently get a doctorate off a Cap’n Crunch box in this universe.

  • Jordon Davis

    This movie makes me retroactively hate everything else the actors have ever done.

    • Chris Mingus

      Really? The guy who played the Human Torch went on to play Killmonger in Black Panther.