Eddie and the Cruisers II: Eddie Lives! (1989) (part 7 of 12)

Cut to Diane’s apartment, where she takes off her wrap and hangs it on the arm of a lamp [?]. Eddie has his painting, which he says he’ll come back for when he has the money (If he didn’t buy it outright, why would the stick-up-his-ass gallery owner let him leave with it?). They discuss Rick wanting Eddie to join his band, and when Diane says, “Why don’t you?” Eddie grumbles, “You wouldn’t understand.” This, my friends, is Eddie Wilson in a nutshell. No one understands him. You see, it’s sorta like being Neil Armstrong, or maybe Pepé Le Pew. Unless you’ve experienced walking on the moon, or falling in love with a cat that you’ve mistaken for a skunk, you just wouldn’t get it!

Eddie wants to know why she cares, and she says she just does, which leads into this lovely moment:

Eddie: Diane, I don’t want to hurt you.
Diane: Then I just won’t let you. [Grabs the back of his neck and pushes her tongue down his throat.]

All together now: Ewwwww! Mom and Dad, stop it! And as for this “I won’t let you” business, let me just say right now that Diane eventually proves as competent at this as she is at painting.

Caption contributed by Mark

Ew.

And now, the sex. Excuse me while I fast forward. I would love to give you juicy details, but frankly they kiss like muskrats and it’s creeping me out. (When people make out, as a rule, there should be much less chewing than what’s on display here.)

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Mark "Scooter" Wilson

Mark is a history guy, a graphics guy, a guy for whom wryly cynical assessments of popular culture are the scallion cream cheese on the toasted everything bagel of life. He spends his time teaching modern history at Brooklyn College, pondering the ancient Romans at the CUNY Graduate Center, and conjuring maps and illustrations for ungrateful bankers at various Manhattan monoliths. Readers are welcome to guess at reasons why he's nicknamed Scooter, with the proviso that all such submissions are guaranteed to be rather more interesting than the truth. Mark lives in the Midwood section of Brooklyn with a happy-go-lucky, flop-eared dog named Chiyo who is probably, at this very moment, waiting patiently for her walkies.

Multi-Part Article: Eddie and the Cruisers II: Eddie Lives! (1989)

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