May 8, 2014
Dungeons & Dragons (2000) (part 5 of 10)
Our heroes enter the bazaar, and Snails immediately starts pocketing random objects in a feeble attempt at a running gag. He’s not very subtle about this, and people seem to notice, but I guess shoplifting is considered a hobby in Antias. He recognizes a suspicious and shifty-eyed purple creature in the crowd, and he and Ridley tail the Deep Space Nine refugee.
Apparently our purple friend is related to the Thieves’ Guild, and Ridley asks him if he knows where they can find Xilus, who’s in charge. The purple guy tells them to get lost and tries to intimidate them by putting. A. Few. Extra. Periods. In. His. Sentences. He does some weird tongue flapping thing to finish, and leaves, making me wonder why a criminal underground organization would pick as its lookout a goofy looking alien with a neon skin tone. Not only did they waste money creating this expensive makeup (complete with a blinking third eye), its presence actually causes the scene to make less sense.
Marina is admiring what appears to be an ancient shower curtain when the Dwarf admonishes here: “If I ain’t drinkin’, you sure ain’t shoppin!” Which would be funny if someone had said something about not drinking. He drags her over to Ridley and Snails, who is camouflaged in useless crap, apparently to stay out of sight as they keep an eye on the Purple People Eater, now talking with a green-skinned pirate. Remember, folks, secret underground crime organization. The party follows the two day-glo critters through the Bazaar, Snails picking up even more vendor trash along the way. By the end of this sequence he has a stuffed cat.