Your Dumb ‘Sexy Hamburger’ Costume Doesn’t Even Look Like A Hamburger, Jeez!

Doin it rongWell, they did it. They made a Sexy Hamburger costume, because your hilarious jokes about “I’m a Sexy Businesswoman!” “I’m a Sexy Mail-Lady!” actually came true like almost a dozen goddamn years ago, and there was nowhere to go but WTF!

Here is the thing though. That is a terrible Sexy Hamburger. IT DOES NOT EVEN LOOK LIKE A HAMBURGER AT ALL! At least the Sexy French Fries say “hot fries” on them so you know what the fuck you are supposed to be looking at.

sexy french fries

Here is Sexy Corn. Does that look like corn to you? Then you should probably STOP RAPING DEFENSELESS VEGETABLES.

sexy corn

Here is a Sexy Carrot. It at least has a cute hat? And reminds us of the Twitter feed @realcarrotfacts, which will never betray us like @ehorse or whatever that thing was called that had you all so verklempt last week.

sexy carrot

This one … well, we don’t really see a problem with this.

sexy catwoman


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  • Gretchen Miller Neuman

    at least the costumes aren’t for toddlers

  • torontomeridith

    If I have one Halloween tradition, it’s watching the College Humor’s, “Girl’s Costume Warehouse” sketch:

  • gullywompr

    I’d hold those onions any day.

  • $73376667

    “All bun” and “no meat” are not normally two things you’d say about the same woman.

  • (((JustPixelz)))

    They look delicious. The outfits too.

  • edith prickly

    Anyone up for Miley and Robin cosplay?

  • Lazy Media

    I did “The Hamburger” as an audience participant with the cast of “Puppetry of the Penis” when they came to Atlanta. It didn’t look like that dress, though. Or much like a hamburger.

    • jodyleek

      Was there more burger than bun?