This Duck Dynasty Chia Pet Beard Planter Thing Is Our New Must-Have Christmas Gift

This Duck Dynasty Chia Pet Beard Planter Thing Is Our New Must-Have Christmas Gift

Well, we’re really getting down to the wire here, and you’re probably getting pretty frantic about what to buy us for Christmas. Thank God you can order things from Amazon and just have them directly shipped to us. For instance, why not gift us this lovely Duck Dynasty Chia Uncle Si Decorative Chia Pet Planter.

Nothing says hip like “Chia Pet” and nothing is as au courant as Duck Dynasty, right? Right. In fact, you should probably get us several of these, so we can put them on each desk, have a few spares to replace the ones that die thanks to over- or under-watering, and use a couple for some more creative beard manscaping, because we know those Duck Dynasty guys like to keep it fresh, beard wise, just like we do, so we definitely need this gift right away.

[There are many things on our Christmas list that are available on Amazon so that you can be sure they reach us in time.]

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  • glasspusher

    A lot of products make a lot of claims. Chia Hair actually delivers!

  • peteywheats

    All this chia beard bust is good for is to prank future archeologists into confusing us with the Babylonians.

  • Farb

    That such a thing exists is soooo depressing.

  • Nixon, etc.

    I couldn’t believe all the Duck Dynasty® crap that was in CVS™ (!!!?!) when I went in to pick up my many Axe® body products.ETA: This thing is super-gross.