Fantastic Four (2015), a recap (part 1 of 7)
Feb 13, 2019
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The foursome still needs to get to the museum, so the Princess decides to carjack somebody, and that’s funny enough, right? But check this out: She carjacks Speed Racer, who’s currently sitting in the “Mach 5 1/2”. She throws him to the street and starts pumping bullets into him, which I’ll admit is actually amusing. For the first thirty seconds or so, anyway. |
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Once she’s done, she says killing Speed Racer was “better than sex with a camel”. That’s really saying something. I don’t know exactly what, but it’s certainly something. |
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Then they open up the trunk, because hey, why not? Inside they find a Michael Jackson impersonator, along with “Spritle” and “Chim-Chim”. Actually, “Chim-Chim” is just a monkey doll in a yellow t-shirt. Yes, they were too lazy to bring in an actual chimpanzee.
We hear a song just different enough from “Black or White” to avoid copyright issues, while Michael Jackson goes, “hee hee!” and closes the trunk. See, this is funny, because Michael Jackson likes young boys, as well as chimpanzees. This is truly some hard hitting social commentary. |
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