Degrassi Junior High “What a Night!” (part 4 of 5)

Cut to Steph and the Twins going to a payphone, while Heather continues to be the only sensible person within a five-mile radius. She even tells Steph that Damon King “just wants your body”. Stephanie laughs and goes, “I know, I know!” And good old Erica just encourages Steph the whole time. So as far as I’m concerned, Steph deserves everything that’s about to happen to her.

The Twins stand outside the payphone while Stephanie dials. Erica calls it “so romantic” while Heather calls it “so dumb!” And then the usual banter about being a “prude” goes back and forth between them. I’ll go into it in more detail during one of the other roughly 5,000 times it happens on this show.

Stephanie gets connected directly to Damon King, and she’s thrilled beyond belief that he actually remembers her. Well, geez, it was only what, three hours ago? Damon makes plans to meet her later on tonight for a “date”, allegedly, saying he’ll pick her up at the “record store”. And at this moment, Stephanie is in Mommie’s Little Girl mode with no makeup on, and actually looking her age, which makes all of this even more disturbing.

She gets off the phone and shares the good news with the Twins. Steph says, “He’s gonna show me how a TV studio works!” By the way, “TV studio” is not at all his codeword for “penis”.

Heather is still being a killjoy, saying it’s not a good idea to go off with some “strange man”. Erica replies, “This is not a strange man! This is a TV star!” And I wonder how many parents once said, This is not a strange man! It’s the guy who made Thriller! See? Nobody ever really learned a damn thing from Degrassi, did they? If they paid attention, a whole lot of shit could have been easily avoided.

Steph says, “I practically know him”, because she’s read about him, and she sees him on TV all the time. Heather persists in being the only sensible person in the scene. She points out that no TV studio is open at night. Steph replies, “TV studios are always open late!” By the way, “TV studio” is not at all her codeword for “my legs”.

Heather warns that if Stephanie’s mom finds out, she won’t simply be grounded, she’ll be “buried”. No kidding. After a certain incident with a certain condom-buying Wheels, I’m amazed she’s still allowed outside without a burqa. Degrassi Junior High: the world’s highest concentration of apathetic, disinterested, permissive, and clueless parents, nine weeks running.

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Multi-Part Article: Degrassi Junior High "What a Night!"

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