Help Us Keep Our Day Drinking On The Down Low With This Brown Paper Bag Cooler

Often when we’re drinking in public (which is ALL THE TIME, thankyewverymuch) we think to ourselves “Self, drinking in public is pretty classy, but how could you make it even classier?” We need not worry anymore, because you are going to up our classy when you buy us this beautiful Bum Bag Brown Paper Bag Drink Cooler
to keep our beverages cool and to keep us looking like the hobos we are.

The Bum Bag is a reusable foil lined beverage holster that will keep your beer cold while keeping your public drinking deliciously undercover. Made from water-resistant and tear-proof Tyvek, the Bum Bag looks and feels like a brown paper bag.

Dear readers, it will only cost you a cool $10 or so to allow us to keep it real fake. Such a small price to pay to keep us from looking like a no-bag fool like Paris Hilton.

Help Us Keep Our Day Drinking On The Down Low With This Brown Paper Bag Cooler
[Get cracking! There’s only…fuck, we don’t know, some days before Christmas and you haven’t bought us anything off our Christmas list yet.]

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  • Nixon, etc.

    Is it wrong for me to actually/sorta/kinda/almost want one of these crazy things? I don’t want to be confused for Paris Hilton.

    • DrShitferbrains

      My christmas list is looking more and more like Lisa’s.

      • Nixon, etc.

        Oh, so you want that classy high-heeld wine thingamajiggy, too? That thing’s SWEET! And super-classy. (As classy as people who use the term “classy”…)

  • BraunKommando

    Now, I really dogdare you to make a real wishlist in Amazon so I can actually buy it for you guys.Maybe. But I really want it to be possible to do it.