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Creationists Watch ‘Cosmos,’ Emit Billions And Billions Of Sad Words

Creationists Watch 'Cosmos,' Emit Billions And Billions Of Sad Words

We must be reaching some sort of event horizon where evangelicals will participate in no culture whatsoever and will stop whining about it, right? Please? Today brings us the inevitable news that watching “Cosmos” — a show that is (thank god) aggressively up front about explaining evolution — made creationists and fellow travelers SO MAD.

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Some of the poor souls oppressed by Neil deGrasse Tyson’s return to the promised land first pioneered by Carl Sagan took to Twitter with their predictable grumblings. My favorite: “Dear #cosmos, the origin of the universe actually is not mysterious. God had Moses write about it in the #Bible. You should read it sometime.”

OOH, SNAP! YA BURNT, SCIENCE!

Seriously, the airing of “Cosmos” was bound to be a vector, a veritably irresistible magnetic force, to conservative doofuses everywhere that refuse to believe in science because their skygod tells them not to and haha they are totally letting the car run all night in the garage just to show those hippy dippy environmentalists what is what. Oh, also too, they’re tired of having Obama rammed down their throat.

If there was any doubt that the rebooted Cosmos series, which premiered last night, would be politically charged and have a materialistic ideological message, consider what viewers saw in its first 60 seconds. The initial opening featured President Obama, with the Presidential Seal in the background, giving a statement endorsing the new series, praising “the spirit of discovery that Carl Sagan captured in the original Cosmos.” That’s not necessarily bad, except for what happened next. Immediately following President Obama’s endorsement, the show replayed Carl Sagan’s famous materialistic credo from the opening of the original Cosmos series, stating: “The cosmos is all that is, or ever was, or ever will be.”

And where else would those words go? They were, after all, the first words Sagan said in the original series, and the whole point of the opening shot — Neil deGrasse Tyson at the same bluff over the Pacific — was to tie the new series to the old.

Dear Christian conservatives: we are sorry that your version of the skygod is so fragile that even speaking about the cosmos somehow negates the existence of your skygod or murders your skygod or whatevs. Plenty of people find room enough in their brains to love science AND a skygod, but your brains clearly aren’t big enough.

Did their breathless terrified prose get dumber? Haha of course it did.

Does it violate the separation of church and state for the President of the United States to be portrayed seemingly officially endorsing Sagan’s materialistic philosophy?

Nope. Next question.

Is this what President Obama intended when he promised in his first inaugural address to “restore science to its rightful place”?

Maybe. Sure. Why not? Most of us that are not you are actually pretty cool with science being all prominent and shit.

Or did the president simply give a general endorsement of the series, and the producers of Cosmos positioned it so as to appear that he endorsed Sagan’s atheistic worldview?

Perhaps you need to stop having such a simultaneously dim and paranoid view of human nature. Bamz’ appearance rolled right into the Sagan opening because a team of people at FOX went “hey, wouldn’t it be cool to have Obama talk and then go all retro with the O.G. Carl Sagan stuff before Neil comes out?” And then other people at FOX said “yes, let us do that, because then many people will watch and we love money.” See? No secret atheist agenda there. Feel better? Probably not, but we don’t care.

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[Salon/Evolution News]

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