VIDEO: Commando (1985)

Prepare for the manliest Halloween ever, as Mendo celebrates Commando, a movie that even Top Gun can’t compete with for awesomeness/homoeroticism! Included are a slew of guest stars, including Sofie, a whole slew of Bears, and “Honorary Bear” Ven Gethenian!

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  • MichaelANovelli

    Happy happy Halloween!

    • danbreunig

      Right back atcha. Also–Mendo making a D&D reference? Serve me up that brawn-meets-nerd cocktail!

      • MichaelANovelli

        Well, now I just feel ashamed. I was actually referencing Final Fantasy X-2…

        • danbreunig

          Shoot. Now I feel ashamed for not knowing *that*. It just sounded like Dungeonmaster lingo to me -,-

          • MichaelANovelli

            Well, I think most games that involve elementals have that trick in there, somewhere.

          • Muthsarah

            Well, I got the reference. ‘Course, I only knew that ‘cuz of Spoony’s review.

            Oh, and muscles + D&D = Vin Diesel. I have absolutely no idea what to do with that, but thereyago. …Happy Halloween…?

          • MichaelANovelli

            His Final Fantasy reviews are his best work.

          • Thomas Stockel

            Sounded that way to me, too. I guess it’s like the way Italian and French sound similar. :)

  • Muthsarah

    I find it hard enough to understand why some people put this movie in the “so bad, it’s good” camp, when it’s obviously “so awesome, it’s glorious”. But homoerotic? Just because there’re a couple of big, muscly guys fighting each other? Hmm…it’s no topless volleyball. Or long stare-downs. It’s manly, that’s indisputable. And I can see how it could be erotic for gun nuts (even if Hollywood prolly shot their….uhh, yeah….in the 80s). But how can ANYthing be homoerotic when WWE’s still around? I figured that’s had the monopoly for decades.

    • MichaelANovelli

      Clearly, you didn’t watch that fight at the end and hope they’d start making out. ;-) And, you know what? That’s OK!

      • Muthsarah

        I sure wasn’t.

        On a completely unrelated note, you seen Escape Plan? Not bad. Not great. But fun.

        • MichaelANovelli

          Haven’t been able to. No money.

          • Muthsarah

            I am still recommending this movie. Escape Plan. For video. Like seriously.

          • MichaelANovelli

            Well, it’s out on DVD, now, so, maybe…

  • Thomas Stockel

    I love the hell out of this movie and it’s one of the reasons why I think the 80s will always rule for me. Aaaahnold was churning out so many awesome films during this time, complete with awesomely cheesy catch phrases.

    • MichaelANovelli

      Yeah. Action movies may be better movies, nowadays, but I miss the muscles…

      • Thomas Stockel

        One thing I think Aaahnold, Bruce Willis and Sylvester Stallone missed was a golden opportunity to team up for a film at the height of their popularity. Hell, even when it was starting to wane during the mid to late nineties. They all knew one another; they were business partners in Planet Hollywood. And hell, they teased a team up with the jokes Stallone and Aaaahnold made about one another in each of their movies. Was it ego? Money? By all rights The Expendables should have been made in ’96 rather than Daylight, Jingle All The Way or Last Man Standing.

        • MichaelANovelli

          Well, maybe not instead of Jingle All The Way, but yes! That would have been much more awesome!

      • Muthsarah

        Uhhh….but they’re so NOT better.

        • MichaelANovelli

          I disagree. Akshay Kumar wasn’t around in the 80’s. ^_^

          • Muthsarah

            Oh c’mon…India doesn’t count. I don’t even friggin’ know that country.

            Today’s Hollywood, versus the Hollywood of the 80s. No question which is better.

          • MichaelANovelli

            I’d learn. India is the future!

  • MichaelANovelli

    I’d also like to give it up for my lovely co-stars!

  • MephLord

    You could make a whole video on the quotes alone. My favorite though is “Do not disturb my friend here. He is dead tired.”

    • MichaelANovelli

      I keep thinking that I’ve already done that, but then I remember it was just a conversation I had with my parents…

      • FullofQuestions1

        You had a conversation with them entirely in quotes?

        • MichaelANovelli

          Well, mostly in variants of, “You’re a funny guy, Sully. I like you, that’s why I’m going to kill you last!” and “Hey Sully, remember when I said I was gonna kill you last? I lied!” Communication is very important, you see. ^_^

  • Cristiona

    Clerks the Animated Series?
    +5 points, Mendo.

    • MichaelANovelli

      Well, obviously. I’m a person of sophisticated tastes. Besides, I know that an M-80 is like a quarter stick of dynamite, so you get four of them together, that’s like two sticks of dynamite! LOL

  • gasmaskangel

    Damn, why am I only now noticing that this exists?! Seriously, Commando is the shit!

    • MichaelANovelli

      Yes! I was wondering when you were gonna show up…

  • Random Russian Guy

    Hey mister mendo. Please dont take any offense but you really need to watch your weight man. Your getting a bit to fat man.

    • MichaelANovelli

      True, but in order to appeal to sexy men, I need plenty of winter insulation. I appreciate your concern, though. ^_^