Category: TV

Riverdale: We can be heroes

Why does the Blossom family take their maple syrup so seriously? Why did they have their super elaborate maple tapping ceremony at the beginning of winter when any New Englander knows that maple syrup season begins at the end of…

The Americans: The Monsters Next Door

Ever since The Sopranos, television has been in love with anti-heroes – not bad guys turned heroic (usually due to the transformative power of romantic lurve) but people who do very bad things just because. Who wouldn’t want…

Once Upon a Time: Swan Song

As a show runner, inevitably, there will come a time in your life when your series is dangling on the precipice of cancellation, your lead actress has just dumped you via Instagram, and seemingly nothing can save it but a…

The Americans: Anticipation

Henry’s narrating the “previously on.” Does that mean he’ll finally be important in the story? Probably not because this is a show that loves to lead you down a path, which inevitably turns out to be a dead end. We…

House of Cards Season 5 coming soon to Trumpmerica

How can television top a White House taken over by a cabal of billionaires, Russian agents, and white supremacists, nominally led by an elderly orange-skinned, ignoramus TV star with spray-tan goggle eyes, whose trophy wife comically refuses to live with…

The Americans: Immersion is a euphemism

Nobody gets killed or gets laid (except possibly off-screen), but the relentless sense of dread, burn-out, and general malaise continues. How much more of this can we take? Philip gets back from saying good-bye to Gabriel, and chats with Elizabeth…

Once Upon a Time: A Black Fairy Tale

This week on Once, Rumple continues his trend of contemplating doing the right thing for about five seconds, before effing up again. (But hey, major points for character consistency!) Also this week, Captain Hook chooses a best man…

Riverdale: Homecomings and goings

Welcome back (again) to Riverdale! These random CW hiatuses are killing me and I don’t understand the logic behind them. Are they trying to drag out the final episodes? Accommodating standardized testings for their teen viewers? Or did they simply…

The Americans: You gotta believe

Which imaginary boyfriend will get Paige’s rose? Will it be Jesus or Karl Marx? Gabriel isn’t making it easy. In their long-awaited meeting, he love bombs her with a Karl Marx quote about sacrifice that sounds like something Jesus would…

Riverdale: Party like an angsty teen

In the aftermath of Jason’s murder, Jughead notes that the town has realized that there is no such thing as control, only chaos. Intercut with scenes of our clean-cut All-American teen leads are scenes from a wild party. The party…