Category: Text

Wayward Pines: Paging Nurse Ratched!

Welcome to Wayward Pines. It’s got a two-word title and northwestern exposure like Twin Peaks, people are stuck in a mysterious place like Lost, and it has secret agents like The Prisoner. The only things missing are humor, originality, wit and irony. But it’s an M. Night Shyamalan joint so what did you expect?

FLASH: Three Heroes, Gazillions of Villains

We’re one episode away from the season finale, and Flash tries to clear all his supervillain prisoners out of town before Harribard’s big attack. It’s a dumb plan that goes poorly. But at least we get a huge battle scene out of it.

Arrow FINALE: Welcome the new Ra's al Ghul!

Season finale time! Team Arrow fights to save Starling City from complete destruction, and before it’s all over, there’s a new Ra’s al Ghul in charge of the League of Assassins. Plus, Oliver ends up happy… but how long can that last?

Game of Thrones: Battle Scars

This week on Game of Thrones, Dany feeds her dragon kids a gourmet lunch. Greyworm lives to be ball-less another day. Jon Snow grows a pair. Sansa comes to terms with just how badly her life sucks. Tyrion grudgingly acknowledges the perks of being held hostage.

Once Upon a Time: Lord of the Assholes

This week on Once Upon a Time’s dramatic two-part season finale, the Author proved himself to be the crappiest alt-world fanfiction writer ever. Snow White got a new, even worse haircut. (Yes, it is possible!) A few people died, then un-died. A long-awaited “I love you” was exchanged. Old Dirty Homeless-Looking Mickey remained Old Dirty and Homeless-Looking, then died and stayed dead. And Storybrooke got both a new Author and a brand new Lord Assholes.

Why Batman will never be black

“But it is kind of sad that, even in an Elseworlds title, Bruce Wayne will always have WASP features when, in many ways, Batman would make a lot of sense as a black man.”

Mad Men: Desperado

It’s the third to last Mad Men: Joan gets a new partner and makes Hobart an offer. Roger and Peggy share a special moment and both display hidden talents. Don goes on a road trip and encounters someone from his past.