Bride of the Monster (1955)
There are varying degrees of both good and bad when it comes to movies, of course. Some movies are so awful they’re only worth watching just once, but others are bad in such an enjoyable way that you can’t help…
Category: Movie Recap
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Hot Bot (2016), a recap (part 6)
Previously: I advised men not to place their penises into fruit that’s been heated to 38 degrees above boiling, and someone in the comments section objected to it. Also, a sexbot is being chased by a United States Senator and…
Hot Bot (2016), a recap (part 5)
Previously: Senator Biter ordered a sexbot, but now she’s in the hands of two teenage boys. They’ve got her stashed in a motel for the night and this is… part 5? Seriously? I have got to get my life together.…
Hot Bot (2016), a recap (part 4)
Previously: Vaguely successful fashion model Cynthia Kirchner thought she got her big acting break when asked to star in a teen sex comedy, but it doesn’t seem to be working out the way she’d hoped.
Limus needs a place to…
Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948)
Over 25 years before Young Frankenstein hit cinemas, another classic comedy involving Mary Shelley’s creation made a memorable impression on audiences. That movie, Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein, was ambitious for a number of reasons. One of these was…
Hot Bot (2016), a recap (part 3)
Previously: The Polish brothers got their hands on some filmmaking equipment again. Now two teenagers are face-to-face with a naked robot. And the robot says...
Hot Bot (2016), a recap (part 2)
Previously: These are the times that try men’s souls. Look on this picture and weep over it! And if there yet remains one thoughtless wretch who believes it not, let him suffer it unlamented. —Thomas Paine (probably)
The Hot…
Hot Bot (2016), a recap (part 1)
Synopsis: Imagine the dumbest idea you’ve ever had in the stupidest dream of your entire life, and then imagine a community center for at-risk 7th graders making a film about it. You have now imagined a better movie than Hot …
Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988)
Robert Zemeckis’s hit comedy Who Framed Roger Rabbit turns 30 this year. While it was a Disney production, this film was a hit in large part because it gave people the once-in-a-lifetime chance to see classic cartoon characters such as…
Suicide Squad (2016): a recap (part 9 of 9)
Well, we got through Suicide Squad. If you just started reading this recap here, I’ll let Superman sum the movie up for you:
But despite Suicide Squad’s banal ugliness, its addled editing, its incoherent characterizations, its risible villain, and its…
Suicide Squad (2016): a recap (part 8 of 9)
A while ago on Suicide Squad: The most useful member of the team found his cojones, only to sacrifice them (and everything else) to kill Enchantress’s brother “Chester”, whose real name I never heard even once. But Enchantress’s machine…
Suicide Squad (2016): a recap (part 7 of 9)
Antecedently on Suicide Squad: The chips are down for our plucky band of felons. Waller’s been kidnapped and mind-probed. Joker’s escape attempt went awry; he got in a helicopter crash *snicker* and he’s *snort* totally…
Suicide Squad (2016): a recap (part 6 of 9)
Heretofore on Suicide Squad: Our titular Squad began their first big assignment: to travel to Gotham Central Star National Fawcett Coast Keystone Gorilla Midway City and rescue an unidentified person from a brother/sister duo of omnipotent wizards who are wrecking…
Suicide Squad (2016): a recap (part 5 of 9)
Erstwhile on Suicide Squad: Amanda Waller’s cunning plan to engineer a romance between an ultra-powerful witch and the single person guarding her somehow ran into problems. Enchantress slipped her leash and went rogue, releasing her brother from his Pier…
Suicide Squad (2016): a recap (part 4 of 9)
Precedingly on Suicide Squad: Waller’s getting the band together. Harley Quinn’s pimp is coming to her rescue. Enchantress is off the leash and up to no good.
Enchantress teleports by wrapping her cloud of bodily funk around her. Her…
Suicide Squad (2016): a recap (part 3 of 9)
Previously on Suicide Squad: Government stooge (and three-time Detective Wyms Cosplay Contest runner-up) Amanda Waller wanted to protect America from a hypothetical terrorist threat by a Superman-type figure. To that end, she assembled a team of lame-o supervillains with…
Suicide Squad (2016): a recap (part 2 of 9)
Last time on Suicide Squad: The Wall got an idea.
An awful idea.
The Wall got a wonderful, awful idea.
She’s smiling because, with Superman dead, it’s the perfect time to pitch this wonderful, awful idea to her fellow…
Suicide Squad (2016): a recap (part 1 of 9)
The DC Expanded Universe: four cursed words if ever there were any.
The twelve hours that comprise the DCEU represent such a pathetically inept wall-to-wall pooch-screw that dunking on the franchise at this point seems almost mean, like laughing at…
Tron (1982), a recap (part 6 of 6)
Before I get into the impact Tron has had on pop culture in the decades since its release, let’s discuss how the movie itself stands up.
Video game-based movies are usually received with not much enthusiasm by most audiences. The…
Tron (1982), a recap (part 5 of 6)
Previously on Tron: Flynn, Tron, and Ram escaped the Game Grid, but were later separated when Sark’s tanks blew up their lightcycles, which eventually killed Ram. But Tron pressed onward with his girlfriend Yori, while Flynn tried to do…
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