May 1, 2020
Boat Trip (2002) (part 5 of 5)
Cut to Nick entering the cabin with Ron. They stumble around, and the bottle of cognac is located, but when Ron turns around he finds Nick snoring loudly against the wall. He wakes the guy up, and shots of Louis XIII cognac are proposed, but Nick opts to guzzle from the bottle instead.
Flash cut to an exterior shot of the ship in daylight, with strings on the soundtrack, and chirping birds in the background. The camera pans up the bed, from Nick’s cankles to him snoring away on a pillow… and then his “date” snuggles up to him.
Remember that heartfelt discussion with Hector from a few minutes ago? Well, Nick sure doesn’t. He’s now running down the hall screaming like his jorts are on fire. Jerry comes in to find him burying his face in the sink, and Nick begins wailing that he just had sex with a man. Then he admits more to Jerry:
Nick: To be honest, I’ve never actually scored since I was a senior in high school, and then I had to promise to marry her. A 51 year old coffee shop waitress. And stroke victim. With a fake leg. And a lazy eye. And a mole with hair.
Well, at least that finally confirms a lot of my suspicions about this mook. He then proclaims how he’s happy now, and declares he’s gay. Thus, Nick Ragoni is about to embark on a quest to completely disgust both genders!