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“Livewire” (S1 E05) Thanksgiving is the third week of November in National City, apparently, as Supergirl takes on a villain from the DCAU who becomes her lamest foe yet.
Someone said something mean about Supergirl on the radio! There's only one thing that could mean - a fight to the death!
Jackie Gleason trips on LSD while Groucho Marx finally makes his grand, God-awful appearance.
In which we learn the true origins of the human race, as well as Caine Wise’s tragic backstory, which is uncannily similar to a certain legendary bouncer.
“Fight or Flight” (S1 E03) Supergirl reveals to the world that she’s Superman’s cousin (which the world somehow didn’t already know) and becomes the target of an old Superman foe.
Every been really mad at someone so you go beat up their cousin? No? Then maybe you're not supervillain material. But Reactron is!
‘Cause there ain’t no one for to give you no pain, except the makers of this movie. It’s the penultimate installment of Ishtar!
“Stronger Together” (S1 E02) Or, “Supergirl Relearns”. Supergirl causes an ecological disaster and realizes she sucks, so she enlists her friends to help her learn how to be a superhero... for the second time in as many weeks.
Superheroing is hard! But don't worry, it's nothing a training montage can't fix. What do mean, we already did that last week?
Thrilling parking violation action, LSD-flavored envelopes, and another legendary actor is unlucky enough to appear in this movie.
“Pilot” (S1 E01) For the first time in a long time, we get aspects of the Superman mythos onscreen not weighted down by angst or failed attempts at achieving Christopher Nolan and/or Frank Miller levels of grimness.
Look, up at the TV! It's some chick who thinks she's superman. The series premiere of Supergirl has arrived.
“Are there people who were convinced up until this moment that bees are questioning, doubtful liars?”
“Well, this is it. This is the final episode of Minority Report... that I’ll be recapping until I move on to another show.”
It's Vega's birthday, and Dash gets a vision of her murder... except he doesn't, and nothing in the vision could have happened if he didn't have the vision in the first place, and why'd she put the watch in her own murder museum in the first place, and none of this crap make sense, but enjoy it anyway.
“Is this a watch that warns him about a future murder or a watch that warns him about a future case of the squirts? Because let’s face it, both of those would be equally useful.”
FOX is cutting Minority Report's freshman season short, but the recaps round on for now. This week, Dash gets laid, thanks to a totally botched vision. See, sometimes it's a good thing to suck at your job.
“And this is what this movie has finally degenerated to: jokes on the level of someone yelling ‘ching chong, ching chong’ to imitate Chinese people.”
“The woman from Central insists, ‘this is not Precrime!’ It’s just... preventing crimes before they happen. Completely different.”
Ever been kind of a dick to your wife? Congratulations, you're not on a police watchlist for future crimes. Also the Constitution no longer applies to you. But on the plus side, Dash is officially working with the police depatrment once again.