May 1, 2020
Armageddon (1998) (part 2 of 13)
When the movie opens, we’re out in space and flying past the moon. The earth comes into view, and we get a blast from the past when, much like sci-fi romps of the 50’s, things kick off with an omniscient voiceover narration. In this case, the narration is provided by none other than Moses himself, Charlton “My Cold, Dead Hands” Heston.
Chuck explains, “This is the earth at the time dinosaurs roamed a lush and fertile planet!” We immediately see a big rock headed right for the earth, which Chuck tells us was “six miles wide” and, in case we couldn’t guess, that it “changed all that.”
The Big Rock hits near the Yucatan peninsula. This is accurate, in the sense that there’s really a crater in the vicinity of the Yucatan peninsula, and evidence suggests it was created by the meteor impact that led to the extinction of the dinosaurs. There’s one big problem with how the impact is depicted here, however: There was no Yucatan peninsula back when “dinosaurs roamed a lush and fertile planet”. There weren’t even separate continents back then—There was just one big continent, Pangaea. This shot of the earth clearly shows all the continents in their present-day configuration.
This is not good news. We’re just seconds in, and it’s already apparent that no one involved with this movie ever heard of basic scientific concepts like plate tectonics. We’re off to a great start.