The Cast of Characters:
. Jennifer Lopez’s career begins its slow, painful decline with this budding documentarian. Standard “Final Girl” material.
. The documentary’s cameraman and token jive-talking black guy, as well as another plum rapper/actor role for Ice Cube.
. Jon Voight, firmly in his “anything for a buck” phase as an over-the-top psychotic snake hunter.
. Terminally bland anthropologist and producer of the documentary. As you’d expect, played by Eric Stoltz.
. Jonathan Hyde as the stiff-assed Brit narrator of the documentary.
. Between this, The Cable Guy
, and Armageddon
, Owen Wilson wasn’t very good at choosing his immediate follow-ups to Bottle Rocket
. As for the character, he’s the perpetually horny soundman.
. Ex-porn and Eight Legged Freaks
star Kari Wuhrer as the equally horny production manager.
. Barge driver and token Hispanic guy. Guess how he ends up.
. Alternately a big, ponderous mechanical snake, and a considerably longer and faster piece of computer animation. Voiced (or is that hissed?) by Frank Welker.
Man, take a gander at that cast! It’ll be a very long time before we get to see such a big group of high-priced stars lowering themselves to this level again, so cherish it while you can.