May 3, 2017
3000 Miles to Graceland (2001) (part 1 of 8)
The Cast of Characters:
Michael Zane (Kurt Russell). A thief and our Noble Hero, thought he doesn’t do much of anything noble or heroic, besides not killing innocent civilians and tolerating the company of the two other supposed heroes of the film. Has a big secret (presumably).
Thomas J. Murphy (Kevin Costner). Our Psycho Villain. Has a major Elvis fixation and a big secret.
Cybil Waingrow (Courteney Cox). Waitress and con-artist. Capable of totally inexplicable actions. Least likely to win Mother of the Year for 2001. A more unlikable character you aren’t gonna find.
Jesse Waingrow (David Kaye). Obnoxious brat. Master of Klepto-Fu who for some reason we’re supposed to like. With the exception of his mom Cybil, a more unlikable character you aren’t gonna find.
Murphy’s Gang: Franklin, Gus, and Hanson (Bokeem Woodbine, David Arquette, and Christian Slater). Gang of robbers who appear long enough to rob a casino and get killed.
U.S. Marshals Quigley and Damitry (Thomas Haden Church and Kevin Pollak). Our lean, mean heroic cops. Wait, I’m thinking of a film where they aren’t played by a standup comic and the janitor from Wings.