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Superman vs. Spider-Man XXX (2012)
on Saturday, December 1, 2012
Porn Critic reviews Axel Braun's latest, Superman vs. Spider-Man XXX. Yes, it's a parody of a classic 1976 comic... supposedly. And it's probably the only time you'll ever see these two superheroes on screen
together, ever. Seriously, this will never ever happen in a
mainstream movie. So it doesn't even matter that the movie is rubbish; it's
just pure fanboy essentialness... with boobs.. Yes, it
Super Friends! “The Mysterious Moles”
“Wow, I think we just saw the first time Aquaman has ever been useful on this show.”Will Cinematic Universes be the end of superhero movies?
“When 2017 rolls around and audiences find themselves being forced to see seven different movies (all within a four-month window) just to keep track of everything going on in multiple universes, we may see a real backlash.”The Dark Knight XXX: A Porn Parody (2012)
Despite the title, there's nothing funny about it. Batman bangs Catwoman, the Joker screws Batgirl (before shooting and crippling her), Nightwing does Poison Ivy, Zatanna [?] has sex with John Constantine [??] and there's not the slightest trace of fun to be had. The Nolan films might take themselves too seriously, but why does the parody have to?The problem with Big Hero 6...
“It was a bit frustrating to see a supporting cast of instantly lovable and visually dynamic characters end up as little more than set dressing.”Superman III (1983): A Work of Comic Genius
The Porn Critic steps out of his Porn Critic persona for his very first non-porn, totally safe-for-work movie review! Superman III is widely considered one of the worst Superman films, but in actuality, it's comedy genius. Watch the review and find out why!Man of Steel (2013)
The first flying sequence is worth the price of admission all on its own. The scope and sense of wonder it evokes is overwhelming, as Superman rockets across the globe, through the clouds, and into space, grinning all the while. Because how can you not have fun when you’re Superman? I caught myself unconsciously whispering, “make me believe, make me believe” in a disturbingly erotic fashion that I’m sure was very uncomfortable for those sitting next to me.
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